The National Vodka Examiner is moving. In addition to an inexplicable number of empty DVD cases, the National Vodka Examiner has amassed quite a quantity of liquor bottles. Before we get comments, know that while we do accept samples, we do not take them in exchange for favorable reviews. That said I must mention the entire line of Effen Vodka products are wonderful and I will be sending them my new address (wink, wink).
Like anyone with more junk than energy, the best way to begin any move is to get rid of stuff. It follows then, the best way to dispose of an excess of alcohol is to mention that you have one. Try this the next time you are feeling unpopular: go on Twitter and announce you are opening up your home to anyone with an interest in free booze. You'll have more friends than you know what to do with, just don't expect to like many of them.
My friends, it turns out, are not squeamish about already-open bottles of varietal vodka. Nor are they overly given to guilt about pilfering the unopened bottles that I failed to hide properly.
If for last night alone, my neighbors aren't going to be sad to see me go. That is except for the several of them who caught wind of and took advantage of the B-Y-NO-B party. A particularly industrious guest made off with my wine opener. Fortunately the theft occurred after the wine ran out, thus the loss was more upsetting than tragic.
It is with a heavy heart, and empty liquor cabinet, that I leave the place I called home for the last couple decades. For my new neighbors, and the aforementioned fine people at Effen, may I say what a delightful housewarming present vodka does make.