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Security doesn't always mean happiness

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Our pets may appear in our dreams acting as an aspect of ourselves. Is your pet courageous? Always there to protect you? Or, is she timid and afraid of her own shadow? Her personality trait in your dream most likely points to a trait of your own that is helping you or holding you back.

Dear Carolyn,

My mother is impatient with my love life. She has thrown up her hands at me. I was divorced more than 10 years ago and she wants to see me remarried, settled down and secure. I have dated a few men since the divorce and mom has approved of every one. But each one has had a personal habit or a character flaw that I did not want to live with. She thinks I am too picky and unrealistic.

Now I have been dating Don for several months, and mom and I are going through the same argument. She thinks I should marry him (he seems inclined to propose sometime soon) and I am feeling uncertain. He is a good man, but holds on a little too tight if you know what I mean.

Here’s my dream: I have Sweetie, my dog, under my arm and I am running toward a storm shelter. Sweetie didn’t like what was happening and struggled to get free and run away. I kept her with me knowing what was good for her – that she would be safe with me and that I would know where she was, which would make me feel better.

Storms were coming. There were big clouds coming toward me. They were white and the sun was also shining. We had to run up a hill to the shelter. A man was there showing us the way, waving his arms like he was directing traffic. He looked kind of like Don.

So what do you make of this dream?

Signed,

Running from a Storm

Dear Running,

It seems clear that you and Sweetie have a prominent trait in common: Neither of you likes to be held too closely or prevented from enjoying your freedom.

In your dream, you force Sweetie to go with you toward the “shelter” where Don beckons. But she struggles to free herself, even though you, or more likely the mother in you, purports to know what is good for her.

What is there to run from, Dear Dreamer? Sure, there are clouds in the sky, but white clouds on a sunny day, not dark threatening stormy clouds. Why would you go into a shelter? Don calls you to join him. He clearly represents a safe place, but perhaps more safety than is called for. That kind of “safety” can be stifling, as you already know.

Your mother’s intentions are good, Dear Dreamer. She “knows what’s good for you,” and for her that means security above all else. But you, not she, will have to live in the confined space where Don controls the traffic. Your dream says to trust your own instincts.

Sweet Dreams to You!

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