The reality show ‘The Real Housewives of New Jersey’ suffered a blow when its star Teresa Giudice and her husband Joe were arrested and hit with a 39-count indictment alleging bank and bankruptcy fraud. That’s reality!
“What really hurt was that I broke a nail trying to slam the door on the Federal agents when they tried to deliver the warrant at my home” said Teresa Giudice, “also, it wasn’t in the script.”
I wasn’t properly prepared for a ‘perp walk’; my shoes didn’t match my bag, my nails didn’t match my mascara and the fraud and tax evasion counts didn’t match my lifestyle.”
“My hair and nail person was off this weekend, I’m retaining water and my tweets aren’t being re-tweeted.
Even so, the Bravo Channel expects this latest ‘flap’ to generate some good ratings. “We’re looking forward to a spin-off tentatively called “Real inmates of New Jersey.” http://bravotv.com
“The often inflammatory nature of the show when personalities clash is part of its ‘charm’ and what viewers tune in for” said Josie McCarty, the director and choreographer of on camera arguments. If convicted the couple face a sentence of 50 years in the slammer.
“And that’s not counting added time for bad behavior” her husband Joe joked as he turned his ‘good side’ to the cameras.
How bad could it be? I saw the jail scene in ‘Good fellas’ and they didn’t have it too bad. The scene only lasted a few minutes and even though they're in prison, they were able to get everything including bread, cheese, prosciutto, steak, salami and lobster.”
‘Hey, do they have co-ed cells?” Teresa asked her lawyer; I can’t believe Bravo would let them do this to us. Who do those cops think I am, Lindsay Lohan?”
I mean 39 counts of conspiracy to commit mail and wire fraud, bank fraud, etc. but to add a charge for using margarine instead of real butter in an ‘al Fredo’ sauce in my cookbook was just too friggin much to take!” she said through her attorney.
She and her husband Joe stood side-by-side in a New Jersey court as they listened to the charges against them tweeting “We’re down the shore and having a great time in the sun.”