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Republicans on welfare

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Patient: I've got some bad news for you (with a smile and a laugh). I'm a Republican. I never told you that before.

Therapist: Hmm. Okay. Did you think that would be an issue for me? Because, as a therapist, I don't discriminate or even care about a patient's political party affiliation.

Patient: Oh, okay. Great. I figured you might have a problem with that (as he laughs).

Therapist: No, I actually think that it's funny too! You see, we just finished discussing how great it is that your juvenile probation officer got you accepted into an independent living program and now you're going to have your own apartment! I think your Republican Party affiliation is hilarious because that program is going to cost tax payers a fortune each month. Tax dollars, funding programs that are pushed through by the Democratic Party, will go to pay for the rent for that apartment. Those dollars will also cover the gas, lights, water and phone bill. They'll also pay for your weekly food allowance and the monthly bus pass that you will receive. That program will receive tax dollars to pay its staff also. Even this therapy session is covered by your Medicaid card, which is a federal program funded by tax dollars. Your psychiatric medication that costs hundreds of dollars a month is also covered by Medicaid. When you go to the dentist or the medical doctor, yes, that is also funded by Medicaid dollars. And hey, guess what, because you've been on juvenile probation and can remain on it until the age of 22, your college education will also be paid for, in full, by tax payers such as me, who pays over $10,000/year in taxes. And because I didn’t commit a crime as a juvenile, I get to pay off $100,000 in student loans! That's because I did not choose to be a criminal as a youth; and therefore, I didn't get a free college education. You see sir, you are what I call a REPUBLICAN ON WELFARE. And as a Democrat, who votes for these democratically sponsored programs, I remain a Democrat and continue to vote along that party line because I want my tax dollars to go towards all of these rehabilitative and preventative programs that are supposed to prevent you from returning to your life of crime that might land you in adult prison some day. But my republican counterparts are not happy about having to pay thousands of dollars to support a kid who chose to become a criminal. They're not happy about having to pay to send their law-abiding child to college while also paying to send you to college. And for those Republicans, who do have children on juvenile probation, they may get to reap the benefits of a free placement in the independent living program but they don't get to tap all of those Medicaid benefits because they make too much money. So they don't get all of the therapy, medication, dental and physical for free until their kid turns 22.

So, by all means, feel free to exercise your right to vote along Republican Party lines and you're going to vote yourself right out of a home, education and free health care benefits. See how funny that is?! It's hilarious!

Although this article was inspired by the last 400 clients seen for therapy services, it is not a depiction of any particular client, but rather a representation of all of them seen for this particular issue. Any identifying information has been altered. Therefore, any resemblance to any specific individual or family is purely coincidental. The purpose of these writings is to reach all of those who identify with these issues, but may never enter into a therapist's office. So, for those who will not come to therapy, therapy must come to them.

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