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Relationships aftter 50... we have changed

The desire to know and be known is one of our greatest needs.  In "Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs," first published by Abraham Maslow in a 1943 paper, "A Theory of Human Motivation," he listed the needs of belonging, love and affection (Level 3) right above our very most basic needs of water, air, food and sleep (Level 1) and and physical security and safety (Level 3).  However, our needs change as we grow older.

Relationships after 50 have a different dynamic than when we were in our 20's, 30's and 40's.  As we grew up we developed relationships when we were single, never married, no children... no life experience.  As we moved through our lives, we learned about ourselves and others.  At our age now, 50 and over, we have experience... and lots of it!  It doesn't matter if you are looking for other women to go to movies and dinner with or if you are looking for a life partner, the dynamics of these relationships have changed.  After 50 we know a few things. 

We know that not everyone can be trusted, we know not everyone will reciprocate the effort and attention we are willing and able to contribute to this new relationship.  We know ourselves better than we did before.  We know what we will and will not accept in others.  We may want someone that can be spontaneous and go to a movie on a whim, or we may want someone that has to plan everything in detail at least a week ahead.  We may want someone to talk to almost every day or we may cringe at the thought of someone needing our attention that much.  We have information about our needs and wants.  We are mature.... hopefully!

This is a forum for us to discuss these needs, wants and how we hope to attain the relationships we want.  As we move through this process of discovery, we will, hopefully, learn more about each other and ourselves.  Maybe even some new tools to use in our efforts.  Please add your comments and questions.  Let's share our 50+ years of knowledge!




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