The most common New Year's resolutions involve diet, whether it's to eat healthy or shed pounds. And one of the keys to keeping those resolutions, says relationship expert April Masini, is enlisting support. In an exclusive interview on Jan. 2, April explained to me what makes the difference.
When it comes to family or roommates, be open in asking for help, says April, author of "Think & Date Like A Man: (Be the woman who gets the man she wants...and keeps him)."
Give them advance notice "that there will no more carbs for you or no more scale to weigh yourself and make yourself crazy. They can help by being discrete with their own carb intake."
And because you're sharing the same space, "it’s a great idea to share your resolution with them because your behavior directly affects theirs," points out April.
In the same way, sharing your resolution with a friend or someone with whom're intimate is important.
"The Beatles wrote, 'I get by with a little help from my friends,' and keeping a resolution is something that friends and family can support you in. Sharing with supportive people can help you keep those resolutions and make your challenge seem less lonely," April advises.
However, be cautious when it comes to sharing your resolution with:
- A frenemy who will sabotage your efforts and denigrate your successes. And that includes those who are competitive with you.
- A family member who you know will disapprove (such as someone who's proud of her cooking and is always wanting you to eat more of her cookies).
In addition, April offers these tips on keeping those resolutions:
- Make them realistic. "Anyone who decides to lose 100 pounds in 3 weeks without surgery (or with surgery) is setting themselves up for failure."
- Choose ones that you can commit to. "For instance, if you resolve to be a better cook in 2013, but in your heart, you really think shopping, chopping and cooking is a waste of time, your heart won't be in the resolution, and without that heart, you'll probably fail."
- If you're lacking in discipline, make a very simple resolution that you can succeed at. Example: Resolve to swap an unhealthy snack like a cookie for a piece of fresh fruit each day.