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Rant and roar against thanksgivuakah, say what?

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Author's Note: Don't spread this around but I intended that this quick piece be a rant against those unnamed coreligionists struggling with the epic issue: 'Should Jews observe the secular New Year's celebration?' But I sidetracked myself by the vehemence with which I spoke out against a certain blended holiday (sic).

For many Jews it's a bone fide moral dilemma with which, however, I take umbrage. Even calling it a "moral dilemma" confers a legitimacy upon it that it does not deserve-very much like the recent Thanksgivuakah phenomenon, however its proponents spell it and will, I’m betting, launch a "How Do You Spell 'Thanksgivuakah? campaign next year which leaves me feeling slightly nauseated.

The idea that one can and should take two very true, popular and good holidays, both having done their jobs well by getting their message out successfully to celebrants over long historical periods of time, should suddenly become half of a new holiday “recipe”, I mean I simply can't abide it.

In the Jewish past, Jewish communal life was deeply rooted in our mesorah-our Jewish tradition spanning the centuries as far back as Sinai. Upholding the mesorah meant continuity of the Jewish people though the 'cost of victory" was shocking. While some beliefs and practices may not have made sense then or today, so what?

Many many Jews have died al kiddush Hashem than forswear their sacred beliefs. So what gives with all the innovative enthusiasm? Why lose the greatness of each occasion’s particularity?

True both do share the theme of thankfulness for G-d’s provision of strength and abundance, their differences of time and place should not be cast into the stew pot in return for a grand festive occasion with no raison d’etre.

Take a moment to consider the name of this blended occasion "Thanksgivuakah". Meant, I suppose, to be taken seriously. Yes, I would not be at all surprised to find out the Thanksgivuakah t-shirt business is booming or that next year's celebration might not include glazed honey hams marketed to those serious Thanksgivuakah observers who wish to make a really bold statement.

Okay, enough already with the mockery.

What is so wrong about Thanksgivuakah? Nothing, and, as I've already alluded, it may very well be a boon to the American Pork Producers Association whose large highway sign just outside of Springfield, Illinois Begin Every Day With Pork will begin to proliferate across America's highways and byways.

Author's Tip: Attention futures buyers, get in early on the pork belly market before prices skyrocket.

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