This is a sensitive subject and many will be appalled and disgusted, however as a parent, it is about being educated. Knowing what can be happening in your neighborhood, in your schools, or even in your own home - is your responsibility as a parent to stay in touch with your children and their lives.
"Rainbow Party" by Paul Ruditis, is written as fiction, however has a powerful message that many will be shocked to hear about. This rainbow party is not about homosexuals coming out, it is about sex and your teens. It is, in fact, an oral-sex party in which each girl wears a different color lipstick. In theory, after the girls perform oral sex on the boys, they would be left with rainbows around their penises.
Many parents have the sex talk with their kids. Many schools offer sex education. There are also many resources, websites and books that can help educate your teens to be better prepared when they do decide to have sex. But have you talked to your teens about the dangers of games/parties such as "Rainbow Parties?"
Questions that may arise and you will need to answer:
- Is oral sex real sex?
- Can you still be a virgin and have oral sex?
- Why is this game dangerous to your child?
- If one guy gives oral sex to another, is he gay?
- How is oral sex fun for girls?
- Why don't boys ever reciprocate the favor?
- What are the symptoms of gonorrhea?
- What is an STD?
- How do you prevent STD's?
Although many would like to simply discard this article and subject, being an educated parent will make you better prepared and lead to safer and healthier teens.
Parents must watch video below.
Comments
Sue - indeed, this is a tough topic. I mean WOW. Is the self esteem of our youth really this low? My heart aches for their sakes...thank you for making us aware of these things, difficult as they are to stomach.
What will they come up with next - and I thought we had strange ideas - it's so sad to hear to what level they are willing to stoop just for some "recognition" - very sad - Thanks for bringing this out in the open.
Thank you, Sue, for talking about the tough things parents have a hard time facing. Imagine how hard it must be for our teens ... with so much pressure, so many new things, struggling to fit in, bullying peer pressure. Ugh. This is a new one to me. I am going to have to ask my teen about it tonight. Thanks for bringing this up. And thanks for constantly talking about the things many parents don't really want to look at.
Rainbow Parties are just another urban legend, like alligators in the sewers. You can blame Oprah for fanning the flames of this hysteria. The whole phenomenon originated with a work of fiction, "Rainbow Party" by author Paul Ruditis.
It might have started as a myth but in some place it is a reality. Here in AZ they are very popular in middle school sad to say. I keep reading over and over that this is a myth when it is not. My college professor was part of a disciplinary committee up in Scottsdale and could not believe that this was happening at the school where she worked. She finally believed it when she saw that there were pictures. The people at those parties now take pictures of the " results"and share with their friends. She also told us that in a study they made they found that these parties are more prevalent in middle school than high school because middle school students find it easier than intercourse since they can't get pregnant and do not realize the risk of STDs.
Maybe we all should also have a talk with our teens about the difference between the fiction and non fiction sections in the library, and how stories about fictional people can help us learn about ourselves. Did you read this book? what happens to the kids in it? Is the rainbow party a good thing or a bad thing in it? Maybe this work of fiction, if written well, can act as a conversation starter with our kids if the powerful subject matter is taken in the context of the story. So yes, lets talk about this book, but don't just skip to the questionable parts!
I have two grown daughters who can attest that this is not urban legend. They are now 28 and 27, but this was a prominent "game". I do not have young children at home now, but I do have grandchildren and friends with young children at home. Our schools had banned the bracelets where our daughters attended middle school and in the high schools too. Even if you doubt the veracity of this behavior, banning the bracelets in a public school is a simple thing. Your children may be wearing them unaware of the implications. Keep them Safe - Educate. Thank you Sue.
I never heard of Rainbow parties. I was watching The Doctors this evening and heard about it. Wow! This is so bad.
"Is the self esteem of our youth really this low?"
What the hell does any of this have to do with self esteem? The kids who get invited to these parties are the popular, good looking kids with the best social skills and usually pretty good marks. It's not as abnormal or new as it's being made out to seem. Yes there are risks, but they could break their neck playing football or get hit by a car crossing the street too. We, as a species, are no longer pretending monogomy is normal. It was never normal, churches forced it down our throats for generations because religious beliefs like monogamy are ABNORMAL, otherwise they wouldn't have had to be enforced for so long.
I don't think we should judge them, who gives you the right to say what is right or wrong, what disturbs me more is that you think that this is a something that all teenagers are doing. This is nothing to what else they get up to. I should know i was a teenager.
for those of you who said you will talk to your teens about this, that is the funniest thing i have ever heard. hearing about this type of thing from parents is much more damaging then not saying anything. maybe 1 kid in a million have heard of this. if your kids are already doing this it's too late- they're sexually active. tell them to use a condom and leave it at that.
OMG! My children range in age from 29 ti 17, and I have never hid anything from them when it comes to sex. My 17 year old told me what a rainbow party was when I let the term daisy chain slip. Ones from the 60's-70's the other is what is happening today. What needs to stressed is the term "safe sex." In order for teens to use safe sex they need to have their parents be open and honest with them, and have access to the proper supplies to keep them safe. We were all teens at one time, and don't fool yourselves, we know that we did what we did when we could. Educate don't judge.
Rainbow Parties are a myth. There is not one verified case of a Rainbow Party happening among teenagers. Why would you believe something that sounds like an adolescent fantasy?
Although there are a lot of people commenting that rainbow parties are not in existence, it appears that these parties (unfortunately) occur more commonly than not. The issue of rainbow parties is not about "right or wrong" but rather protection. In this game, to leave the "rainbow" protection isn't used: STDs and STIs anyone?
This is coming from the opinion of an eighteen year old, and I strongly advocate protection and that the Talk should encompass instances like rainbow parties that aren't very familiar to most teenagers or even adults.
Please check out an article on the IT Campaign blog:
site. teezitnow. com/blog1/2010/07/07/insider-information-from-a-teenage-girl-rainbow-parties/
@Bobbie
Yeah, it may be a very widespread thing... Now that Oprah spread it everywhere!
God, ask literally any teenager or young adult.. Nobody had heard of it before 2003/4
But now that they have, they think it's a good idea. That's when it became widespread.
There are no verified cases, and the only survey that was done that I know of was by the New York Times, about 2 years after it had begun being a widespread topic.
Just because kids have heard of them in rumors or know what they mean from Oprah doesn't mean that they happen.
I did this in College...in the late 90's. However, ours was called the "Coral Snake". Certain girls were required to wear certain lipstick: Red, Black and Yellow. This was during the time when "Goth" chicks were something new and wearing black lipstick was the cool thing.
This happens all the time at the younger ages. Im guessing parents are not around at the time this is going on. This would never have happened when/where I grew up. Parents were too involved for this to take place. If you have a group of 10-16 year olds, THEY SHOULD BE, AT THE VERY LEAST, CHECKED ON EVERY 10-15 MIN. If parents do this, kids would know there is a better chance of being caught. Therefore, they would be less likely to even attempt it.
For this to take place (a round robin of Oral sex), there needs to be time and space...Something parents should not afford thier children when they are with a group of their friends, especially when boys AND girls are present. It all comes back to parents doing their jobs as parents....
Agreed! Most parents these days are trusting their kids WAY TOO much. Remember when you were 13/15? Remember those thoughts in your head? Remember how you were to your folks? Kids have not changed...Parents have just become too soft. "But what if I hurt my kids feelings?" seems to be the attitude I come across all too often.
I'm 20, and I can also attest to the argument that these are an urban legend. I heard about this legend when I was 12, but never ever encountered evidence of any Rainbow Parties.
I'm a teen male and to all that say it happens- where's my rainbow party? The things some people beleive. In a society that thinks "slut" is a bad thing how could such a thing at such a young age exist?
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