This article originally appeared as Puppy Bowl IX Event Predictor Could Cause Digestive Illness on Pet 360.com
Did you watch the Super Bowl XLVII? If so, were you rooting for the Baltimore Ravens or the San Francisco 49ers? Alternatively, is your preferred event the half time show featuring the musical stylings of Beyonce and Destiny’s Child? Perhaps the big game isn’t for you at all and instead Animal Planet’s Puppy Bowl IX dominated your Sunday night viewing slot.
Well, this Puppy Bowl featured compelling action galore brought to you by a select team of canine athletes. The competing pooches spanned the spectrum of age, size, breed (or mixed breed), and geographic background. The Puppy Bowl IX Game Day Pups included:
Aroura
Although Aroura is a Siberian Husky having a family lineage tracing back to China, Puppy Bowl scouts discovered her four legged talents in Kansas City, MO. Teamwork-based strategy is not exactly Aroura’s forte, as she’s prone to grabbing a random treat and sprinting for the end zone.
Biscuit
She’s a mixed breed who must have championship quality blood, as she was reportedly scouted for the Puppy Bowl before her eyes even opened (which typically occurs between 10-18 days of age). Biscuit has lived up to her prodigious potential in scoring four touchdowns in her first (pre-Puppy Bowl) professional outing.
Chestnut
Chestnut has been a media darling during his collegiate years, but will his Alabama charm override his reputation as the league’s biggest ball hog? Chestnut’s opposition believe his success is really attributed to an off camera pigeon, which distracted the competition and permitted him to bound to victory in pre-season play.
Elias
Elias is a supremely fit Los Angeles based Pit Bull puppy. His off season training in Southern California’s seemingly continuous balmy weather permits “two a day” workouts since he was a mere two days of age. Like so many LA residents, Elias has worked in “the industry” (entertainment) and was recruited for the Puppy Bowl after being spotted during the filming of a direct to TV movie.
Marta
Marta is a Schnauzer Beagle Mix hailing from the now failed Omaha canine football league. She was recruited as a special teams player and worked her way into the Puppy Bowl’s starting lineup as a result of her four paw play interference. Despite being pint-sized, her bark and bite match dogs of much larger stature.
Sally
Sally is a Dachshund-Basset Hound mix with a reputation for having the best paws in the game. Don’t be fooled by Sally’s habit of showing her belly in apparent submission. She’s previously earned a four game suspension for stealing slippers. Fortunately, the penalty was in dog years, so Sally was only out for 1/4 of a game.
In preparation for the big event, Animal Planet had a novel means of predicting the winner of this year’s Super Bowl involving Puppy Bowl competitors. The eager canines were given their choice of Ravens purple/black and 49ers red/yellow all-natural, dog-safe cakes baked special for the event. All dogs ran to the San Francisco cake and licked their way to an apparent prediction of a 49ers victory.
I hope that the attempted prediction of the game’s winner didn’t inadvertently cause any of the puppies to have digestive tract upset. As this apparently delicious and reportedly dog safe cake is likely vastly different from the food these puppies regularly eat (considering Purina is a Puppy Bowl sponsor), my concern is that the Super Bowl-themed confectionary could lead to vomit, diarrhea, decreased appetite, or even pancreatitis.
After all, would the Puppy Bowl audience really want to repeatedly endure medical time outs during the competitors’ bouts of diarrhea? If such were the case, then one of the show’s corporate sponsors, Bissell, would likely have many great opportunities to display the effectiveness of their cleaning products on the astroturf.
Thank you for reading this article. Your questions and comments are completely welcome (I’ll respond).
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Copyright of this article (2013) is owned by Dr Patrick Mahaney, Veterinarian and Certified Veterinary Acupuncturist. Republishing any portion of this article must first be authorized by Dr Patrick Mahaney. Requests for republishing must be approved by Dr Patrick Mahaney and received in written format.
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