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Public sex conundrum: How to experience the thrill without getting caught

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This week, we hear from a reader with an unusual question that many of you may have, but never thought to ask:

Jamal, from New York, NY, writes:

“My girlfriend and I get really turned on by public sex, but obviously, we don’t really want to get arrested for public indecency or anything like that. Any suggestions on how can we get the thrill without the risk?”

Well, Jamal, for many couples, it’s just the possibility of getting caught that makes sex so exciting; but you're right – getting arrested for indecent exposure or lewd behavior is more than a little embarrassing and could have some pretty severe consequences. On the other hand, you don't have to give up on the idea altogether; you can try to simulate the public nature of the activity without actually having the risk using some of the following ideas.

Some options that are a little bit safer might include having sex in your own back yard, or on your deck (or balcony, if you are in the city), or in a hot tub – but if your outdoor areas are not completely private, make sure that you wait until dark so that others don’t see you.

Now, another option would be to go camping. Having sex in a tent can feel very exciting because you are out in the woods, under the stars to an extent; or you could even rough it a little bit more and go into a part of the woods that is safe, but also secluded enough that a bunch of campers are not going to come upon you.

Other people find hotel sex to be exciting, because there are always people buzzing around, which makes it feel a little bit more public than the privacy of your own bedroom. Whatever you decide to do, just be smart about it –if you do take a risk of a more public place, make sure you leave as many of your clothes on as possible, so that you can make a quick cover up if you need to. Good luck!

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