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Pope Francis: "My other car is a Pope-Mobile"

The Pope lifted the ban on condoms but forgot the instructions
The Pope lifted the ban on condoms but forgot the instructions
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The Pope-Mobile’s bumper sticker showed that things were changing in the Vatican. It read ‘My other car is a Ford Focus’

Pope Francis has proven to the world that he is a man who is changing Vatican protocols and talking about concepts that some see as radical thinking.

To fund his program of feeding the poor he’s going to dip into the Vatican museums and library treasures and go directly to Ebay.

“We’re going to liquidate some of the treasures the church has accumulated over the years and build low cost housing for the poor and downtrodden. That should give Rush Limbaugh a few shows worth.

For one thing, this pointy mitre should fetch a couple of bucks. I had 3 of them knocked off my head last month in these short Vatican doorways and I almost poked out Monsignor O’Malleys eye last week.

I’ve been down in the cellar and we’ve got some things we need to get rid of. No, not those dusty skulls, just the good stuff, like booty we haven’t catalogued from the middle ages.

There are all kinds of Bruno Magli red leather shoes that were hardly ever worn. I mean none of the Popes ever went dancing in them. We have capes that would do Liberace proud.”

Asked about speculation that a woman could be among the newly appointed cardinals, he said: "I don't know where that idea comes from but Angelina Jolie would be welcome any time.

And don’t think that rides around the grounds in the Pope-Mobile are out of the question. I know some world leaders that would kill to get behind that wheel.”

The font type is ‘Times New Roman’ in homage to Pope Francis

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