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Police chief makes fool of himself citing satirical marijuana casualty article

Chief Michael Pristoop

One day after Colorado officially legalized marijuana possession, the Daily Currant published a clearly satirical article highlighting the "37 deaths" attributable to legal marijuana in just the first 24 hours. This mock article was enjoyed by many who took the minimal amount of time necessary to know that no deaths have ever been attributed to marijuana consumption, and hence the claim of 37 deaths in 24 hours was patently ridiculous.

Sadly however, Annapolis police chief Michael Pristoop does not appear to fall into the category of people who have taken the time to learn even the basics about the cannabis plant, a fact made especially remarkable since Pristoop has clearly devoted a large portion of his life to violently and militantly opposing the plant. During his testimony opposing the decriminalization of marijuana in Maryland, Pristoop had the following to say:

“I remember the first day it was decriminalized there were 37 deaths.”

It was at this point that laughter began to be heard throughout the Maryland Legislature, as the audience witnessed this self proclaimed marijuana authority citing a blatantly satirical article in an attempt to perpetuate an increasingly questionable drug war. While Pristoop did offer an apology for his incompetent research, his exact statement didn't exactly overwhelm people with reassurance, as Pristoop made sure to reiterate that he did initially believe the information to be accurate:

“I believed the information I obtained was accurate but I now know the story is nothing more than an urban legend.”

While a healthy dose of mockery has been offered to Mr. Pristoop, the underlying reality of this theatrical episode is the less humorous one of a police state using drugs as an excuse for their actions, and agents of this domestic military displaying almost no knowledge whatsoever of the very substances they're expected to police.

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