Amid all of the devious, outrageous plans that Hollywood terrorists concoct to get access to the United States' launch codes, walking through an open door would just come off as uninspired.
Yet, according to a report today from the Associated Press, Air Force officers entrusted with "launch keys to nuclear-tipped intercontinental ballistic missiles" have been accused of letting it happen. Or, at least, they've been accused of inviting such an incident.
Under ideal conditions, when an officer charged with babysitting America's nuclear cache decides to take a nap (don't giggle, it's apparently a real part of the job), the officer is required to close a blast door that is specifically there to prevent some ne'er-do-well from gaining access to a nuclear launch control center.
Two times this year, however, officers tasked with closing said door have failed to do so.
Thankfully, the scariest possibilities of this kind of neglect have not been realized, but officials have informed the AP that these instances are not isolated. According to the AP, recent infractions have included: "a failed safety inspection, the temporary sidelining of launch officers deemed unfit for duty and the abrupt firing last week of the two-star general in charge." And these are, quite frankly, the instances that have been reported publicly.
Granted, these blast doors are not the only thing keeping a terrorist from gaining access to these warheads. We're talking about extremely secure locations with dozens of people whose sole duty is making sure that the bad guys don't get their hands on our nukes.
Given the cataclysmic possibilities of personnel failure at these sites, however, this news is understandably disconcerting. After all, if the people who are trained to follow orders without fail time and time again are neglecting their duties, can they be the only ones?