This poem was written by a Lemonade Lady who does not live in Enid, but attends through our Facebook page and messages.
Her poem speaks of relationships within the family structure. When the tables turn, and the mother becomes the child and the children the mother, the love must be strong for this phase of life to go smoothly for everyone. In many cases, the bulk of the care-taking is often left to one of the children, while the others go about their daily life, paying little attention to mom, or the responsible sibling. Even if the parent was a bad parent, there will usually be the one child who will push those injustices aside, and will be accountable for the care. When the other siblings turn their back, they don’t have to see the reality of their neglect; however, Karma may be knocking at their door when they are the one sitting in a nursing home, waiting for their children to come visit.
There are three common excuses children use to avoid seeing their elderly parents:
1. Not enough time
The siblings who use this excuse have no idea of the sacrifices their brother or sisters who are the primary care givers make each day.
2. I don’t have the money
This is another excuse often used; however there are many things they can do that cost nothing. In most cases, the child who did most of the care giving is not paid, nor do they receive any more in inheritance than the ones who did nothing.
3. I can’t bear to see mom or dad like that
The siblings who say this don’t realize the one who is doing the care giving can’t bear to see them like that either, but they are more dutiful, and consider it a privilege to honor their mom or dad.
Because we are human, often times the caregiver will begrudge their siblings, who have put the entire burden on them, however, they say nothing. All these emotions are expressed in the Lemonade Lady poem, No Better than She.
No Better than She
Why can’t you see That you’re really no better than she? I’ve heard your complaints I want to respond But my words remain silently locked away
Why can’t you see That you’re really no better than she? The visits are rare The cries ring loud
Both near and far Where is she? What have I done?
Why can’t you see That you’re really no better than she? Your efforts while earnest Fall short of the need Leaving me with the bulk of the burden.
I listen in silence Your complaints ring out I can only hope That someday you will see That
You’ve been no better than she