The new era of social networking is great for introverts. Through outlets such as Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook and using email or message boards, people can connect with a wider variety of people in their own element, often in the comforts of their own home, with no pressure whatsoever.
But the problem is, networking is not just working your contacts through the ‘net. Networking is still about making personal contacts and building relationships with professionals and colleagues who have similar goals in mind. And meeting those people in person.
Despite our ability to easily communicate using social media platforms, many of us still fear the in-person networking event.
Can you relate to this scenario?
After putting on your best business casual clothes and grabbing a handful of business cards (click here to see how you can get 250 business cards for free), you head out the door to a networking event. While in the car your mind is racing a bit with questions like, “I wonder who will be there? Will I say the right things? Will this be a waste of time? Is it too late to turn around?” As you pull into the parking lot you notice your slightly sweaty palms; you toss in a mint and take a deep breath. As you approach the room, the voice in your head says, “OK, you can do this.” You quickly scan the room of over 100 people, hoping to spot a familiar face you can find safe harbor with. But the whole goal of being there is to “network” and meet new people, so you say to yourself, “OK, it’s game on!”
This is exactly what runs through the mind of Karen Kodzik, owner and a career counselor with Cultivating Careers, which serves people in mid-career who believe in actively managing their career opportunities.
“Even though I am a successful career consultant and I coach professionals about networking every day, to the surprise of many I am an introvert,” says Kodzik, who offers a free 30-minute career consult to prospective clients. “I can feel the same pain of my introverted clients who have this networking experience.”
Because networking is such a large component of job search, here are tips Kodzik offers to help introverts master the art of networking:
1. Don’t apologize or feel badly for being an introvert
Recognize that it isn’t your natural tendency and that there are ways to effectively network within your style.
2. Understand that we can adapt our style when necessary
Because business is anchored in relationships, it is important to learn how to adapt your style in a way that feels genuine yet is effective. Think of it this way: there will always be parts of our work we don’t like, yet we learn how to do them well to be successful. Once I came to that realization, I could step into any room full of strangers.
3. Play to your style
Arrange to meet people in smaller groups and more intimate settings. It is much easier for us introverts to meet an individual over coffee and to network in smaller groups.
4. Evaluate and address the fears that prevent you from networking
These range from fear of rejection to not knowing what to say to not wanting to impose. Uncover and address these factors so they don’t present ongoing barriers to networking.
5. Manage the head game of “no one will want to talk to me.”
Introverts are typically very good listeners; people in general feel good when they can talk about themselves.
6. Learn some basic conversation starters
It is easy in job search because conversations typically revolve around what you do, where you used to work and what you want to do next.
7. Start networking with people who you know
It’s more comfortable to network with familiar faces. The fear of rejection is lessened.
8. Practice
Even if you may not like it, start to sweat or feel your heart racing at just the idea of networking, practice. It reduces the physical symptoms. Trust me, the more you do it, the easier it gets.
Introverts unite! There is hope for you and lots of people — introvert and extrovert — to meet and make valuable connections.
Comments
Wow, thanks for this helpful post! I, too, am an introvert and use the tactic of approaching smaller groups. The tips on conversation starters and listening more are especially helpful.
These are great tips. Thanks for sharing.
thanks man, this helped
Hello...I'm Traci, and I'm an Introvert. :)
Great article! Thank you.
Hi, great article, very useful for the introverts; the extroverts could learn something from it too (if interested in the challenges the introverts face when networking).
I think there is a misunderstanding here. Pls understand the meaning of being introvert. The author seems to think that introverts are always shy - which is not true. This article is for people who are shy - both introverts & extroverts.
Hi, I think a better title would be "Networking for Shy People." Introverts, according the the Myers-Briggs definition, are people who draw their energy from quiet, down time after interactions with people personal or group. Extroverts draw their energy from being around people and thrive on lots of personal & group contact.
Otherwise, the eight steps recommended are great ways for a shy person to build their networking "muscle."
I, too am an introvert but hardly shy. I found the tips to be quite helpful. Thanks for sharing.
Kathy, Ragz, I think you are being a little too critical of this article. I think it hit the nail on the head with what people think when they think introvert. Great article.
Does anyone pay attention to those Myers-Briggs tests anyway? It seems like the only people who pay attention to those are the career people who promote them.
The article was helpful. I'm an introvert even though my friend calls me an undercover extrovert. I tend to do better with smaller groups.
I am an INFJ and I don't think all introverts are shy and I'm certainly not. Maybe all shy people are introverts though. People tend to think I am aloof because sometimes I don't say much, but that's usually because I am processing what I hear. Other times, you can't shut me up.
I think it's important for this topic to be addressed though, both to help introverts succeed in a world dominated by extroverts and to demystify them to everyone else. It's the stigma of introverts that really bothers me--the whole loner, serial killer type of notion.
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