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Neolithic Era Painting Of First Breadstick Fetches One Million Pounds!

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Cheeswicz, New Jersey – In the grand opening auction held at Tony’s Auction House in Southern New Jersey this past weekend, a painting from the Neolithic Era depicting a once popular item at the now defunct restaurant chain, Olive Garden, sold for one million pounds of breadsticks to an anonymous billionaire bidding remotely from Beverly Hills, California. “Obviously, we got pretty excited when the auction began and we had an immediate offer,” said Tony Federico, Founder of the brand new auction facility located on Route 49. “Even though the buyer offered to pay in breadsticks instead of American currency, we are honored to have been a part of this historical transaction that will undoubtedly have an everlasting effect on the way Olive Garden’s saga will be recorded in history books,” added Federico.

The painting, which dates back to 4100 B.C. was created by a nomadic group of people in the latter part of the Stone Age known as the Bredstyckians, who are credited with taking agriculture to a whole new level when they formulated the world’s first edible dough material that could be shaped into a stick and covered with garlic butter and onion salt before being inserted into a primitive baking oven.

Although the painting was never given a formal title, researchers from all over the world offer their creative beliefs on how it should be named. “In my mind, it was to be called Breadsticks over Butter by these revolutionary people,” said Ralph Chamberlain, President and Vice Chairman of the NBA, the National Breadstick Association, which was recently formed to support breadstick awareness following the collapse of the long-lasting, Olive Garden Dynasty. “It is the responsibility of the NBA to ensure that these unique pieces of history are not lost in the feast of life,” added Chamberlain.

Other items sold at the auction included a set of plastic salad tongs and a napkin embroidered with the ancient Olive Garden logo, an illustration of a pair of crossed breadsticks. The amount that each sold for was not disclosed.

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