If you see a couple hundred naked bicyclists in Philly on Sunday, it's not because you had one Corona too many this Labor Day weekend. You likely are lucky enough to witness the first ever Naked Bike Ride in the city.
Clifford Greer, a 30-year-old audio-visual technician, is organizing the initial event in Philly. He says he is doing it to raise awareness for bikers rights and safety on the road. In addition, he wants to promote fuel consumption and the importance of a positive body image.
He wants people to treat bikers with respect by shedding his clothes in public. He thinks baring his assets for men, women, and children to see is going to help his cause.
Is this guy serious? What happened to signs, handing out literature, online petitions, staging a full-clothed bike ride that slows down traffic? This guy decides to bike naked. I hope he doesn't fall and accidentally have his man organ get caught in the chain of the bike.
Look, bikers deserve some consideration and drivers need to be aware of who else shares the road with them. That is another social etiquette column for another day. However, violating another social etiquette code is not the way to go. There is no need to bike nude where children will see this.
People will undoubtedly be appalled by this scene on a Sunday morning. All it takes is one father to be enraged at the prospect of his little girl watching a man's penis swing around in the flesh to get the blood boiling. If one person is upset, bad things could happen. The bicyclist may end up eating dirt and a whole lot more.
If you happen to see this group of clowns on Sunday, simply call the police. Let them handle it. They can and will write tickets for lewdness and other charges. Don't end up with legal issues of your own by confronting this group, pushing them, or throwing things at them.
And, if you are worried that the police won't get there in time, chances are they will already be along the route. Greer says he will e-mail information to people who sign up for the ride online. I'm sure no police officials or media outlets registered.
Then again, nobody ever said a naked bike rider was a smart bike rider.
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