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My girlfriend, my football coach and Davis Love III walk into a golf column

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After watching the US team fall apart like a cheaply-made, non-rain-resistant windbreaker, I didn’t want to focus on a bummer like the 2012 Ryder Cup was for the American side.

Most people don’t really want to be sad but sometimes we have to face the sadness and face it with courage. That’s how learning is done. So here's my take on how the US can win the next one.

If it wasn’t for my girlfriend, who came over that Sunday afternoon to cheer me up, I would’ve had an emotional hangover for days. The right woman can do that—make just about everything seem better.

My countenance changed from European blue to rocket-glare red as we watched the closing ceremonies. The American team looked positively ill. I’ve never seen Tiger so depressed, even when Applebee's waitresses were selling his erotic text messages to Us Weekly.

Needing 4½ points to secure an American win in the Sunday singles, a mere 3½ was all Davis Love III’s boys could muster.

How in the wide world of sports did it happen? How has the US lost 7 out of the last 9 Ryder Cups? Well, each one was different? Each one had a different team, different captain, different venue, different weather, different uniforms, different mood in the locker room, etc. Even though, he’s not out there making the putts, the answer to the painful question is the captain.

My high school football coach could have brought the Cup home with a lead like one the Americans had going in to Sunday. A quintessential football coach if ever there was one. Each time he chewed me out or gave a pregame speech, I thought I was in a well-cast movie.

Coach Panizzon was cut from the same cloth as Lombardi and Wooden. The man brimmed with integrity. He made everyone around him better which his 5 CIF Championships would attest to.

Coach Davis is an accomplished golfer, but because he has 3 Roman numerals after his name, and grew up on country clubs, he might not have been tenacious enough for the job.

It is not yet determined who will be the American captain for 2014 at St. Andrews, but I’ll bet the American players would make more putts if there was something like Bill Cowher waiting to speak to them after finishing a match. If there’s not a coach like that in Scotland, I’ll be sure to keep my girlfriend on speed dial.

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