As I am sitting here I begin to wonder in which direction is my life headed regarding goals. and financial stability. I have always set goals through out each year to progress in them before or the beginning of the year, but this thing called life tends to knock me back each and every time. I consider myself to be an intelligent individual, but that alone is not getting me to where I need to be. I can make a resume look and sound great, get people involved with the right contacts to network with, even help people achieve his or her own goals, but can never manage to move mine. Sometimes I feel as if I always have to invest my time in someone else business instead of having my own. I have researched and did several home based businesses but yet they never moved me or given me that feel as if this is it! I started out trying to write a book but really just haven't had the time to continue. So out of all my doing I have got to the point where I just wanted to give up. Who am I kidding I have too much going on to even focus on myself yet alone tie my time and energy in a business! I know you are probably wondering what is it that you are doing that you can complete your tasks?
Well, here is my story........................
My mother became ill and suffered from a stroke in 2005,at that time I was living with my mom along with my oldest brother, during this time he got married and began his life with his wife and children. I also have another brother who is married with a family as well. Well, normally the girls always step up in times like this and due to me being the daughter I took on that responsibility and from then on my life totally changed. I became my mothers caregiver and she relied on me to care for her as she did for me. This had to be one of the hardest things I ever had to do because I was not use to seeing my mom in a condition where she had to depend on someone. So I did what I had to with the help of my brothers, but at that time I felt as if I needed more. I really felt as if I was losing me, I could not do everything I wanted to because I knew where I needed to be ,but in all I sacrificed.
Sometimes people would ask how can I do this and just put myself on the back burner yes I will admit I felt as if it was not fair but I knew that if the shoe was on the other foot my mom would do it for me. Even during those times I knew that I had to be at home caring for my mom so I seek for opportunities that would allow me to work from home and still bring in income. Well, that did not always work. Then I began shifting toward a home based business but at the time finances just would not allow it. So time moved on and my hunger grew stronger to succeed in an career by maintaining something of my own. Having a career has always been a passion of mine I use to imagine walking the streets of New York carrying a briefcase trying to get to my next business meeting. I guess you can say I wanted to feel important, happy and content with my life! The whole concept of me fulfilling my dreams brought so much joy to my soul. I was not trying to impress anyone just trying to fill my void. Over the years of me still caring for my mother my dreams have never stopped instead they matured. I am still determined just waiting on that chance to succeed. I know sometimes I look and ask myself how when nothing has changed, I am still my mothers caregiver, she still rely on me for her care. I am not able to go and network as I may want too, or have the finances to build my empire, but I can still dream! Nothing can slow that process down but me, I can encourage myself enough to know that the thirst is still there and as long as I have that I know that my blessing will come threw. I wrote this to myself to remind myself that regardless of your situation still having that motivation can take you a long way. In reality some people say dreams are just dreams, but in my mind dreams do come true!