Without the Mother, the only way to be “fearless” is to go into the mind. It is not a true fearlessness, of course, because true fearlessness is a result of raising our sense of identity to where fear is no longer a possibility; fearlessness comes from knowing who we are in God. When we know who we are in God, we don’t feel threatened by anything on earth. It is the Mother within us that is our faith, our trust, our comfort and our wisdom of knowing. Mother is what is intended to be the freely flowing “waters” of our emotional body. Therefore, when we feel fear, we need to go to the heart of the Mother, not to the thinking mind.
Some people who use their thinking mind to escape fear certainly seem fearless. So, what is “mental” fearlessness? It is an avoidance of fear by literally “thinking” the fear away. The strategy is to focus only on positive thoughts and to refuse to think about anything fearful. On the surface this seems a perfect solution. What could be wrong with focusing on the positive? It’s not that focusing on the positive is wrong or even ineffective; it’s that refusing to think about our fear or to feel it is actually an action of shoving the fear down deeper within us, instead of healing it. In order to heal, we have to admit to ourselves and to God what we are afraid of. In order to admit it, we have to face it.
We actually need to look more closely at our fear and listen to what it says, instead of pushing it away. Because if we listen to our fear, we hear the voice of the belief behind the fear: “I am afraid that I am bad.” “I am afraid that I am worthless.” “I am afraid that I will be left behind.” Which all boils down to, “I am afraid that God does not love me.” How can we feel safe if we believe that God does not love us? We can think all kinds of positive thoughts all day long, and it won’t erase that belief, because it is lodged in our sense of identity, and our sense of identity supersedes our thoughts. And what is more, our subconscious overrides our thoughts.
In our subconscious are all of our deeply held beliefs. They come to the surface for healing through our feelings, which is expressing Mother; Mother is a flow. When we try to think our fear away, which is a rejection of Mother, it gets locked away in the emotional body (no flow), where it festers and grows. We don’t feel it, but we cannot feel real joy or happiness either, because it is not possible to selectively suppress our emotions. In other words, we cannot suppress one emotion and not another; we can only suppress our emotions, period. The avenue for the expression of emotions is either blocked or it is not. If it were to be unblocked for one emotion, such as joy, then fear would rush out as well, being part of what is contained in our emotional body. Therefore, if we suppress fear, we also suppress joy. We can appear to be joyful, just as an actor can appear to express a whole range of “emotions” for a role, but this is a mechanical contrivance and is not real.
We are encouraged to express negative emotions, not in order to exacerbate them, draw attention to them, or identify with them, but in the same way that a doctor would express, or draw out, infected fluid from a wound. Once it is drawn out, it is disposed of and the cause of the infection is treated. In the same way, a negative emotion, or feeling, is a symptom of an infection of wrong belief within us. Fear is a signal that we harbor within us the belief that we are not worthy of God’s love, care and protection and therefore we do not have it. We don’t feel loved by God, and therefore we feel powerless.
Power is a masculine attribute of God; it corresponds to God the Father. If we feel separate or in conflict with the Father aspect of God, then it is easy to see how we would feel powerless and therefore afraid. Yet if Mother within is our faith, trust, comfort and wisdom of knowing, it makes sense that if we feel estranged from the Father, we need to be closer to the Mother, so she can help us to cultivate her loving qualities. It is She who brings us closer to, and helps us to reconcile with, the Father.
In truth, Mother is one with Father, just like two sides of the same coin are one. So, in order to know our oneness with God the Father and His power, we have to know and accept ourselves as Mother. This means that we have to accept and love the Mother within us. If we have rejected or denied the Mother within us, our reconciliation process begins with Her.
continued in part 2