Skip to main content
  1. Life
  2. Religion & Spirituality
  3. General Religion

Moses: Israeli hooligan

See also

Moses is more dangerous to society than Charles Darwin is, contrary to what Kent Hovind says. Following the example of the venerated prophet Moses is a very dangerous thing. The Presbyterian/Lutheran serial killer James Eagan Holmes was imitating the murderous actions of Moses. “James Eagan Holmes regularly attended Christian worship services,” said Jerry Borgie, senior pastor at Penasquitos Lutheran Church in San Diego, CA. “James Eagan Holmes was heavily involved in his local Presbyterian church,” said Holmes’ neighbor in Aurora, Colorado.

Holy Bible (Numbers 31:1-40): Under God's direction, Moses' army defeats the Midianites. They kill all the adult males, but take the women and children captive. When Moses learns that they left some alive, he angrily says: "Have you saved all the women alive? Kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves." So they went back and did as Moses (and presumably God) instructed, killing everyone except for the virgins. In this way they got 32,000 virgins – Wow! (Even God gets some of the booty – including the virgins.)

The Midianite massacre: Have you saved all the women alive? This is a Bible story that everyone should know (Numbers chapter 31). It begins with God telling Moses to take vengeance on the Midianites. (He doesn't say for what, but supposedly it was for the sex and dinner party that brought on God's last round of killings.)

So Moses does what he's told and sends off 12,000 men led by Phinehas (the guy who stopped God from killing everyone by impaling the couple who were having sex). First they killed every male "as the LORD commanded Moses." And they warred against the Midianites, as the LORD commanded Moses; and they slew all the males (Numbers 31:7). Next they killed 5 kings, And they slew the kings of Midian ... namely, Evi, and Rekem, and Zur, and Hur, and Reba, five kings of Midian (Numbers 31:8a) along with Balaam (the lunatic with the talking donkey). Balaam also the son of Beor they slew with the sword (Numbers 31:8b).

Then they took the women and children captive, collected their animals and valuables, burned the cities, and returned to Moses. And the children of Israel took all the women of Midian captives, and their little ones, and took the spoil of all their cattle, and all their flocks, and all their goods (Numbers 31:9). But Moses was not pleased. Here is what he said: And Moses was wroth with the officers ... Have ye saved all the women alive? Behold, these caused the children of Israel ... to commit trespass against the LORD ... and there was a plague (Numbers 31:14-16).

And Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves (Numbers 31:17-18). (You see, it was the Midianite women who had sex and a dinner with the Israelites. And that's what upset God so much. So all the non-virgin women had to be killed.)

So that's what they did. They went back and killed all the non-virgin women, keeping the 32,000 virgins alive for themselves. (Nobody is sure how they separated the virgins from the non-virgins, but God probably helped out with that.) Since there were 32,000 virgin women saved alive as booty, experts figured there must have been about 200,000 people killed in this genocide, which would include all of the males (i.e. men, boys, babies) and non-virgin females. Skeptics Annotated Bible and Dwindling In Unbelief (Steve Wells) have great biblical commentaries.

Moses is also a liar. Lee Levine, a professor at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, writes, “There is no reference in Egyptian sources to Israel’s sojourn in that country, and the evidence that does exist is negligible and indirect.” Levine also wrote that excavations showed there had been no walls at Jericho (Jewish Eugenics by John Glad).

Advertisement

Life

  • Derek Hough
    Derek Hough brings quadruple threat talent to 'DWTS' and beyond
    Today's Buzz
  • Hookah smoking
    Young adults believe hookah smoking pose no health threat
    Camera
    7 Photos
  • Top outdoor activities
    Don't spend your summer indoors: Top outdoor activities to do with your significant other
    Camera
    10 Photos
  • Baby shower idea for men
    A new twist on baby showers is throwing a Daddy Baby-Q
    Camera
    7 Photos
  • Wedding special
    'Curvy Brides' offers a new look into every bride's pursuit for her picture perfect wedding gown
    Camera
    7 Photos
  • Morbid obesity
    Health: Morbid obesity decreases life span by up to 16 years
    Camera
    7 Photos