“When I first met my husband, it was clear to both of us from the first couple of weeks that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together…marriage was the logical conclusion.” - Leslie* writes (fictitious name). Leslie and I have never met, but found one another via twitter when I was doing a simple people search and came across LoveHonorCherish.org. As a writer enthusiastic about improving the experience of love for myself and faithful readers, I reached out to learn more. That’s how our conversations began. (Photo: Amanda Holden.)
“I have great marriage models in my family.” Leslie told me. “My family is an extremely close-knit Irish-Italian family. My parents had a marriage [of] truly equal partners (my mother passed away last year) that my brothers and I always admired and wanted to emulate.” Leslie, who married last year, has an older brother who is gay. He recently celebrated the 15th anniversary of his commitment ceremony.
“Support Love. Honor commitment. Cherish Freedom.” These words greet you when you first visit the website, LoveHonorCherish.org, a California-based organization established in May 2008 with the intent to raise awareness and remove the barriers to same-sex marriages. Last year, they raised $500,000 to prevent the passage of proposition 8 in
Leslie joined the organization last year after proposition 8 passed, in frustration and in an effort to lend technical and grassroots support. By day, Leslie is a the director of production at an internet marketing agency, by all other hours, an activist. “What I find frustrating is that it seems that many people define gay couples by the sex act instead of the complex dynamics that make up a relationship of which sex is just one part. All relationships are about sexual, emotional, and intellectual compatibility as well as practical matters like having the same morals, ethics and goals in life. Everyone, gay and straight wants those things from their relationships.”
Which begs the question Leslie posed to me: How are same-sex relationships any different from straight people's? It is a question worthy of reflection. Modern Love, by its nature, espouses tolerance and acceptance for those who seek consensual, committed and tender love.
Once upon a time, I held views about homosexuals that now shame me; but I came to understand these concepts were rooted in fear and judgment, and through reflection, I found an openness in my heart towards those who seek love with the same gender. I don’t expect to change someone else’s opinions with this column, instead, I encourage those who support equality for California couples to visit LoveHonorCherish.org and learn more about how they can get involved.
By the way, if you are wondering Leslie's real name, it is Robert. He and his partner are one of the 18,000 same-sex couples whose marriages last year are still considered legal by the state of California.
The best compliment you can give me is to share this column with your family and friends. Follow me on twitter: ModernLoveWritr.
Send questions to tmbsdre@yahoo.com
© 2009 all rights reserved Tinamarie Bernard
Comments
Great article TinaMarie! I love how you personalized it. Thank you tinyurl.com/psdatingex
You can't mention only one aspect. Each thing has two sides. But love is cherish and great most of time. Only if realise the importance can you enjoy it. I show this to my honey know at BiFlirts.com the bisexual girl, charming. She also think so.
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