Missing Mom on Mother's Day

Single Parenting newsletter

Miss you, Mom - wish you were here. :)

Mother’s Day is supposed to be a happy occasion on which we all show our moms how much we love and appreciate them. Letting our moms know how much they mean to us becomes even more important as the years go on, especially as we come to the realization that we won't have them with us forever. For those of us whose moms have already passed on, this holiday can be a difficult one. It seems that every commercial, television and radio ad, and every shop window screams reminders of the special day that we are no longer able to celebrate with our own moms. Practically everyone we know is talking about their Mother's Day plans, and of course our kids want to celebrate with us as well. Is it really possible to enjoy this day with our children when the loss of our own mom has left such a gaping hole in our lives and in our hearts? It is possible, but will take time and patience. You will never stop missing your mom, but eventually you will become accustomed to her absence and be able to truly enjoy the day. Until that time comes you may have to just go through the motions and pretend a little; revel in the kind acts and love that your children lavish on you, and don't let on that you are missing your own mother so much that you can't even manage to speak of her. Put one foot in front of the other,  plant a smile on your face, and eventually your heart will follow. As time passes, sharing memories of your own mother will become easier, and you will learn to enjoy those memories and laugh again. You may not be able to see your mom anymore, but she is with you all the time; she will always be a part of you and she helped make you the wonderful person and mom that you are today.

If you are estranged from your mother, this holiday can also be a difficult reminder of the relationship that you yearn for, but may never attain. If there is anything you can possibly do to patch up your relationship with your mother, do not put off doing it. There is nothing worse than regrets when you've lost someone you love, when it's too late to do anything about it. Realize that your mom and you don't have to see eye-to-eye on everything, and you may have to meet her halfway in order to have a relationship with her. Although the relationship you eventually attain may be limited, and not exactly what you'd hoped for, it's usually better to have your mom in your life, and in the lives of your children, than not at all.  
 
Being a good mother is the most difficult job there is, and the most important. As we get older and appreciate our own moms more, we often come to fully understand how much they have done for us, and how we will never be able to repay them for all the sacrifices they have made. Striving to be the best mom possible to your children is the greatest way of paying tribute to your own mom.
 
Laugh whenever you can, enjoy your loved ones, let your mother's memory live on, and live life to the fullest -  it all goes by too quickly.

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, Fort Collins Single Mom Examiner

Raina Granger, a freelance writer and mother of three daughters, enjoys sharing her daily struggles and experiences as a single mom with readers that are dealing with the same difficult issues. Contact her at singlemoms@comcast.net.

Comments

  • Jolene Arford 3 years ago

    That was a very nice tribute to your mother, Raina. Loved the photo and would like to have a copy. I think everyone has asked themself the quintessential question, "What is the meaning of life? Why am I here?" I decided a long time ago that my purpose in life is to leave behind 2 decent and good human beings - my children. In order to do that, I must be the best mother I can to them and try to instill a moral compass which will serve them and others well. Enough said.

    Jolene Arford

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