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Misery loves company and happy is single

When life has handed you lemons, there is no better place to turn to than your friends. Most of the time, they're there for you, too, ready to give you a shoulder to cry on or ears to hear your curse filled venting. If for some reason, your friend was unable to answer the phone, you can bet that, if you left a message, s/he will call you back to give you the support you need. It's an amazing thing to witness and partake in, even if you are in the middle of your misery.

When life is great, you scored a Dooney bag for $50, the guy you like asked you out, you scored last minute tickets to a sold out concert, you ran a 5k in record breaking time, who do you share it with? I know for myself, I may mention it in a side swiping way and try to downplay its importance for fear of standing out too much or being seen as perfect. Or sometimes out of being seen period. (I'm working on this...)

However, despite the heart wrenching pain of watching my mom deteroriate before my eyes, my life is great. I've had so many great moments in a day that sometimes I just sit at my desk and smile for all the beauty I've been blessed to see. What I would like to do, and have tried, is to call up a friend or two to shower them with the beauty. However, as always, the phone ends up ringing until I get voicemail and I rarely get a call back. I know the reasoning "Oh...she's ok. Her heart isn't broken and her mom didn't drive her crazy. She's just happy. She's ok. She doesn't need me."

What I am learning in my own life is that this is how I rationalize things myself. When trying to prioritize your life, sometimes, the things that are the most pressing are the ones that are misery based. If I'm reading a good book and a friend leaves a voice mail that's unsettling, I call back immediately. If the voicemail is normal or happy, I figure, I can call back later to hear the good news. So when the shoe is on the other foot, while it is frustrating, it is the laws of the universe at work: you get what you give.

And I'm learning that sometimes, on my happy days, which are becoming more and more consecutive, is when I need the most support. I am trained to wait for the other hand to drop, for the rug to pull out from underneath me once something marvelous has happened. Surely, good things can't happen all the time, right? Well, I'm changing that mindset because I believe it can. I mean, why can't it? Why can't people be happy more than they are sad, stressed, depressed, worn-out, over worked, or burdened?

And furthermore, if we can wake up and expect the day to beautiful and marvelous no matter what actually happens, can we also find support or shoulders to stand on or ears to hear our wonderful tales? Is it possible? Is it possible to talk to friends and family and actually purposefully discuss all the happy things in our lives, gigantic and miniscule, with wreckless abandon? Can we truly find support when we are fabulously happy or must we have misery in order to guarantee company?



  • Sherri Thornhill-Dallas Generation X Examniner 5 years ago

    Happy is single for me right now!lol

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