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Men and the pregnancy waiting game


If you are like me, the word “wait” can be thrown in a pile with the rest of the four-letter words. I don’t like to do it and, in practice, avoid most settings in which it is required. Just ask my dentist, who has placed 12 calls my way to schedule an annual cleaning.

However, when my wife, Joanna gave me the news,“I’m pregnant!” there was no way around it. Wait was the name of the game. But this was a new thing for the both of us, it wouldn’t feel like waiting, but more like experiencing something for the first time- I thought.

She was four weeks pregnant- which really means, about two weeks post conception.  Very early stage. And after the initial amazement wore off, that left us with only 35 and a half weeks to go... Let the waiting game begin.

That’s right- in total 40 weeks for the process. At first you’re like, “Ok, this won’t be bad. It’s gonna fly by with all the preparation and showers and baby-equipment set-up.” The next thing you know you’re sitting in the middle of your freshly painted nursery, in your new (first) house, with nothing more to assemble- meanwhile your wife is a mere 20 weeks along, asking for Panda Express again, saying if she’s only halfway done and already this big, she’ll never make it to June, much less August 19.

Your friends are no help either. As an F.I.W. (Father in Waiting), you’ll find your already-daddy buddies give you the most unnerving, bordering on awful, advice. “Sleep now, ‘cause you’ll never sleep again.” “Save your money. College is expensive.” “This is an 18-year investment with no guarantees.” and “You can’t run now.”

Thanks guys. With advice like that, how could I sleep well?

Needless to say, our Peter did eventually arrive, early actually and I am sleeping fine most nights.

While mothers bare tremendous physical and mental changes, us fathers should not consider ourselves immune to our own pregnancy pangs. And like most things, the waiting eventually ends, and the real work begins. Now that I think about it, I better call my dentist back.