Manti Te’o and the advantages of a fake girlfriend

But first let's address the elephant is the room. Physical intimacy is a big problem.

There is no actual sex. Perhaps some cyber fooling around. Maybe? But not body to body action that would send Rick Santorum into deliriums and Newt Gingrich off searching for his next wife.

Still, there is an upside to loving someone who is totally made up. Less conflict.

For an example, with an ersatz, the problem of messy, (fill in the blank), is eliminated. Bathrooms, kitchens, closets or personal grooming. It doesn’t matter. Couples won’t fight about such things because half of said couple doesn’t exist. Or conversely no one is compulsively cleaning up as you sit in a chair watching football videos. You know the sitcom scene where the man raises his feet as the little woman vacuums.

Toilet seats can be left up or placed down. Toothpaste- go wild and leave the cap off. Hey, she's not real, squeeze from the middle of the tube. (It's said that small annoyances destroy relationships. But only between two human-type people.)

There won't be any screaming arguments in restaurants. Okay, a couple- man and avatar can quarrel but no more than 140 characters for each volley. Plus, volume control.

Bonus.

Palling around with a person who does not actually exist makes choosing where to go for the holidays very easy. Should we visit a real house and family or sit at the keyboard?

Made up women do not get old, ugly or fat. Unfortunately, they seem to be accident prone and susceptible to fatal diseases.

False friends are like false gods. If they bring comfort, fine. But don’t believe everything that is written.

p.s. There is a bonus for most of the citizenry whose friends draw breath and bleed when injured. Donald Trump looks like a moron again.