Man wearing women's panties-should it be a relationship laugh or lie?

If a guy wears women's panties, should he lie about it, or joke about it?
If a guy wears women's panties, should he lie about it, or joke about it?
Photo credit: 
PhotoXpress.com


Today's topic of the day is in regards to straight guys who enjoy wearing women's panties. Should this fact be a laugh or lie between the string bikini bearing boy and his boo, as well as his bros?


A reader recently asked me what I thought about his infatuation with wearing Victoria's Secret string bikini panties. My immediate mental reaction was probably the expected, judgmental kind--something along the lines of, "Um that's friggin weird!" Before reacting this way however, I stopped and told myself to look at this with an open mind for a second.


Probing questions were asked, such as


  • Why do you wear them?

  • How long has this been going on?

  • Have you ever tried wearing a men's thong instead?

  • Can you go without wearing them?

  • What have women thought when they found out?


This reader went on to explain that he merely liked the feel of his 'Vickie's', that he has tried men's thongs but they have not felt the same, and that although he could go without them, he does quite enjoy them. He has not told his previous girlfriends for fear of their reaction, nor has he told his guy friends. He thought maybe he should just toss it into conversation during happy hour at the Cherry Cricket one night, in a joking manner, which I quickly declared a terrible idea.


Now, I firmly believe that clothes don't "make" the man (although ZZ Top was on to something when they claimed that every girl is crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man), so the same would be true for underwear, right? Is this reader less of a man just because he likes to wear string bikinis?


My biggest fear for this reader is not so much that his friends and potential girlfriends will find out he wears bikini panties, it's more in what they will think about him hiding/lying about this fact. If he's like other rowdy, good time guys, there's a chance they'll be hanging out somewhere and he'll get depantsed as a prank. What will his bros say?


Or what if, while having a sleepover with his newest love interest, he runs to the bathroom or to answer the door, only to return her rifling through his drawers, having stumbled upon a collection of various colored string bikinis. Girls snoop, so this is a very real possibility. How will she react? More than likely, she will initially think they belong to another woman...either someone he's hiding now, or a woman from his past that he's not yet over. She will inevitably wonder what else he is hiding or has he lied about? Has he experimented sexually with men? If not, has he fantasized about it? Does he have an affinity for drag? Will she go out one night with her girlfriends to Drag Queen Bingo at Hamburger Mary's only to see before her eyes, her own boyfriend working her Manolos better than she ever could? Oh the horror!


Does he set her straight that she need not worry as in fact it's neither of these scenarios, or does he further lie to protect her from the truth?


Alternatively, is his best bet to make a joke out of it from the beginning, so he's not hiding anything from her, and so she can support him (if in fact she doesn't run for the hills) in the event it ever comes up in conversation with his friends? Because let's face it, his friends won't react as negatively to finding out if they know his girlfriend's ok with it.


I suspect most people's reactions will be similar to my initial reaction, if not more aggressive and hurtful. Accusations will likely be made and relationships could be negatively affected as a result. Instead I figured posing this question to a broader, impartial audience would give this reader a clear idea of the perspectives he might encounter, so he can better decide if he wants to broach this topic with friends.


So let's hear your comments. Should this reader ditch his Vickie's for Manties? Or should he just confess to his friends and lady love that his loins are more comfortable in a cotton crotch cushion made for women than in breathe-friendly briefs? Or should he just say to hell with everyone and keep his secret just that...a secret?


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, Denver Men's Relationship Advice Examiner

Amy Zanlungo is the first person her friends turn to for relationship advice. Her candid, no holds barred attitude may not always be what you want to hear, but it is what you need to hear. She thrives on learning more about the intricacies of interpersonal relationships and looks forward to...

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