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Magic 2015 spoilers: Three colorless top-downers from Seba169

These kind of jokes, you can only get away with at core...
These kind of jokes, you can only get away with at core...Seba169, MTGSalvation.com

Core sets are the time for top-down designs to shine - since they're flavor-neutral in terms of a world (both the sets and cards in question, that is) they fit better in core than in a real expansion. And MTGSalvation.com rumor mill veteran Seba169 has uncovered three colorless, very much top-down Magic 2015 cards from image files.

Radiant(?) Fountain
Land
Common
When Radiant(?) Fountain enters the battlefield you gain 2(?) life
{t}: add 1 to your mana pool

Meteorite (5?)
Artifact
Uncommon
When Meteorite enters the battlefield it deals 1(?) damage to target creature or player
{t}: add one mana of any color to your mana pool

Hot Soup (1)
Artifact - Equipment
Uncommon
Equipped creature (can't be blocked??)
Whenever equipped creature is dealt damage, destroy it.
Equip (1)?
"Coming through!"

The flavor all of these are aiming for is obvious - fountain of life (but not Fountain of Youth), which is a very familiar folklore trope; mana rock (literally) falling from the sky and bonking someone, and getting out of the way of the guy carrying the big scalding soup pot, which he burns himself so bad on he dies if he drops it. None of these is particularly strong in Constructed or even Limited, per se (although one of them is evasion and the other is removal on a mana artifact), but they definitely add a touch of fun and can be played by any deck. The first two cards do indeed have flavor text - but it's unreadable at this point.

What do you think of these three funny top-down designs? Let me know in the comments.