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Living With Cancer XXVI

Living With Cancer XXVI

I want to thank all of you who have been reading these excerpts of a book I'm putting together about my life growing up with cancer in my family. As you know my mother fought the disease for 15 years ultimately dying in 1979. She was only 40 when she passed but she really did have a good life. Growing up I never really wanted for anything and when I did I worked for my father at the gun shows. I was good at sports and had pretty good grades for most of my youth. I had a mother who was soccer mom, worker, volunteer, wife, and who fought cancer most of her adult life.

I found out through some of the feedback to these writings that many of you who I went to school with were not aware of what was transpiring in my home. You honestly did not know that my mother had fought cancer for so long. Friends who I have known for 40 years have come up to me and said I only thought she had cancer for a couple of years.

I have enjoyed the correspondence from those who have read these installments around the world. I have enjoyed answering your questions. To those of you who have acknowledged that you are dying of cancer and are going through some of the same changes within your family structure that I went through, I hope I was able to help.

You see just because my Mother died it does not mean that cancer has left my life. Over the past 34 years I have been able to talk and comfort a few of your loved ones along the way. Some of you are aware of this and some aren't. I do not claim to have all the answers, hell I don't even know all the questions. Just understand when life was at it's darkest and I could have ended it all with one shot, I didn't. I kept struggling through this existence we call life. I have fought God and lost and have given my soul over to him.

I have enough material now to finish the book and when the time comes that it is published some of you may be horrified at many of the things I did after my Mom died. I was an angry young man and death became a friend and I didn't care who lived or died. I was able to focus later on and went to college where I emerged with three degrees. I have experienced more than most and less than some. What my living has taught me is that life is so very precious, and that as adults it is up to us to teach our children properly. It is through our mistakes that our children will learn.

I hope to have the book finished in about a year. I look forward to you reading it and hopefully not hating me by the end of it. I had a great childhood even when dealing with Mom's cancer. I learned that love and faith are our two most important weapons when fighting certain things in our lives that are beyond our control. Peace.