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Listen to your head or your heart?

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Earlier this week one of my friends was struggling with how she felt about the guy she's been talking to. She asked me the classic question, "Do I listen to my head or my heart?"

My friend has a very straight forward, right brain personality much like myself. But this way of thinking makes the abstract parts of life, such as feelings, more difficult for us to define. The problem is that we let logic lead the way. We look at dating from a compatibility stand point, as if there was a score board. We think of ending the relationship as a test that wasn't passed. But the irony of this desperate quest for perfection is that love doesn't work that way at all. If anything it's the exact opposite of perfect, unscathed compatibility. I have dated guys that, on paper, were perfect for me. But what I've come to realize is that until you long for their presence and their absence hurts your heart like you've not felt before, you haven't loved. Love has no logic and it doesn't make sense. Relationships are about listening to your heart.

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