Friday's World Suicide Prevention Day (September 10) reminds me that lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender teens are the group most at risk, and it's a point worth taking to heart for parents, teens, sex educators, and community leaders everywhere: LGBT youth are 4 times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual peers.
Lily Tomlin (currently starring as Marilyn Tobin in Damages on FX), Judith Light (Claire Meade on ABC's Ugly Betty), Jesse Tyler Ferguson (Mitchell Pritchett on ABC's Modern Family) and Mae Whitman (Amber Holt, on NBC's Parenthood) discuss this fact and more as the newest spokespeople for the Give a Damn campaign (see video at left). It's a troubling fact, to be sure. If you're a lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender -- or questioning -- teen and you're considering suicide, please visit TheTrevorProject.org or call the Trevor Lifeline now at 866-488-7386.
It’s shocking, but true: Gay and transgender youth are at a much greater risk for suicide than the average adolescent. More than 2 out of 5 think about suicide often, and 1 in 3 have attempted it.
It’s not because of who they are. It’s because adolescence is stressful, and facing adolescence as a gay or transgender teenager is even more stressful still.
Because imagine how you would feel if you were regularly harassed and assaulted for being “different”—not just by your peers, but even by your parents.
Imagine finally being brave enough to completely open up to your loved ones about yourself—and being rejected, or even thrown out of the house.
Imagine feeling like you have nowhere to turn for help or support. Imagine feeling so isolated, unloved and alone that you start to wonder if anyone gives a damn whether you’re alive—or dead.
Suicide is one of the most preventable causes of death for young people: I've seen it estimated that it takes an average of just four sessions with a licensed therapist to turn a troubled teen from seriously considering ending his or her life. And you can go one better, by creating a supportive environment in your home, school, and community, to help make sure they never even get to that ledge in the first place.
Parents: Regardless of what your own political, religious, or personal persuasions may be, ask yourself if you've created an environment where your own children would rather commit suicide than open up to you about their sexuality.
Sex Educators and other leaders in the school community: How "comprehensive" is the education you're providing? Who are you leaving out? What resources -- education materials, counseling services, health services, suicide prevention hotlines -- could you be pointing all of your students to so that the LGBT youth you serve can find meaningful answers without being singled out? How does your school community respond to bullying, verbal abuse, physical abuse, and sexual abuse of students who are -- or are perceived to be -- lesbian, gay, bisexual, and/or transgender? What could you be doing that might help save the life of one of your students, now or in the future? Is your classroom an LGBT Safe Space? Is your school?
Teens: The homophobia of your parents' generation is passé. How many of your favorite TV shows and movies now have LGBT characters, or feature LGBT actors? How many of your close friends are LGBT? How many more of them might be, but haven't opened up about it yet? What if I told you that you might actually be able to save their lives, just by being a supportive friend, standing up against bullying and other abuse in your school and community, or pointing them to some caring adults who can help?
It’s time to give a damn about the suicide risk of our gay and transgender youth. Not just because all kids deserve to know that someone cares about them, but also because research has shown that giving a damn actually makes a huge difference in the lives of gay and transgender teens. Peer support groups, teacher training, a caring adult — all help lower the suicide risk among gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth.
It’s time to give a damn, because growing up should be about making friends, discovering the world and discovering yourself—not about finding a way to end your pain and end your life.
Comments
This is such an important topic, yet it remains swept under the rug, or stuffed in the closet, as the case may be. Why are parents, educators and editors so afraid to discuss this? Silence does not make it go away. Shoving one's head in the sand does not bring about understanding or solutions.
I wrote for a local parenting/family magazine for several years. I pitched this topic when they did their annual "send us your ideas" roundup, and was cut from the freelance staff a few months later due to "budget." Coincidence? I wonder ...
Thanks for the Give a Damn video (it worked for me when I clicked on it, even though it says "This video is still being uploaded") and for the links to The Trevor Project and the Safe Space resources from the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network. I wish we'd had educators like you when I was in high school: We lost four students – 4! – to suicide during my junior year, all of them with the same story: They couldn't bring themselves to come out in our conservative community, or to their own fundamentalist Christian parents. In retrospect, I wish I could tell them: "Just get the hell out of this damned town, and you'll be fine, and everybody else can deal with it or go to hell."
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