Ever leave a staff meeting and say “That was a waste of time?” Hey, if you have always loved every meeting you have attended you are either lying or brain dead.
Even meetings that are really good or somewhat good have some folks leaving who feel discounted, sabotaged, or ignored. These are people who usually grab a confidant and complain behind closed doors.
Sadly, those who really hate meetings leave their good creative input underground, like a diamond covered with mud in the backyard.
ANSWER: Staff meetings have all the emotional elements of a family gathering!
“Impossible,” you say, “None of us are related so what does family have to do with anything?”
Think about this for a minute. We all come into meetings bringing all of our personal behavior patterns with us. No one is excluded. We can’t see them, smell them, or touch them. They are never the less, hard-wired in our nervous system.
What we were taught in our original organization, the family shows up in staff meetings. All the ways we were taught to relate as kids, how we were accepted or not, all the roles we learned to play to survive and be accepted, they all come into the meeting room with us.
Do you procrastinate, are you someone who protects your turf, are you the one who questions every possibility, and are you the doubter in the group?
Often we pretend that meetings don’t bother us. We put on our armor, and take on the familiar role as clown, or peacemaker, or rebel. Some stay silent, others never stop talking.
The way OUT of this meeting hell is to begin with personal accountability. It is up to each of us to OBSERVE how we respond, UNDERSTAND why we do what we do and then, TRANSFORM that behavior to its positive opposite.
Take a look at the “Pattern Aware Success Guide” for a short education in making meetings work by changing behaviors that don’t.