A big thank you to Ellen Kullman, CEO of Dupont for the following thought:
“Children don’t do what you want them to do when you want them to do it. Organizations don’t necessarily, either. You've got to listen. You've got to learn how to influence.”
Leaders who really get the connection between what we learned in our original organization, the family and what we take from there to our present work organization as grown-ups have an easier time handling the conflict and office politics of the day.
Think about when you were a kid. What kind of “gotcha games” were played? I promise you they were there. Were you the one who started the game or at the effect of it? All of us have stories of “Gotcha” from childhood.
Now, think about work. Who plays the drama king or queen? Who is the “me, me, me” super achiever? Who dons the cloak of rescuer? And who plays the victim with award winning whining?
Now as a leader, what do you do to squelch the noise and the wasted energy?
Suggestion: Influence your employees by helping them learn the way OUT of the petty game playing. There is a quick “cheat sheet” of the 13 most common patterns that we bring from family into the work place. Offer this to anyone who wants it. Don’t force the issue just offer. It is a quick one page scan of the patterns and their positive opposites.
You can also suggest going to www.ceoptions.com to take the pattern aware quiz to get a read on which patterns have the most pull on you. It is easy and fun and you will get a fast response to see the major patterns that you need to work on. Let’s all become pattern aware and change faster and smarter for the better!