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Lady Gaga hangs on to NBC Universal partnership for dear life to promote G.U.Y.

Lady Gaga promotes her G.U.Y. video and defends the Doritos ARTSLOP Barf Show
Lady Gaga promotes her G.U.Y. video and defends the Doritos ARTSLOP Barf ShowNBC Today

In a move to promote her music video for "G.U.Y.," Lady Gaga appeared on NBC Universal's Today Show this morning on March 21. Milking her partnership with NBC Universal for all she can, the recent SXSW #BarfShow "Swine" singer showed up at the crack of dawn dressed like "Cousin It" from "The Munsters." Covering up her plump body with a gigantic black Snuggie® and camouflaging her swollen cheeks with a super-long clearance wig from Spirit Halloween, Lady Gaga sat with Savannah Guthrie for a 5-minute chat.

Guthrie mechanically asked Gaga about the new "G.U.Y." video, the contrived ARTPOP persona, and the ARTSLOP SXSW vomit show controversy. Gaga had all the answers and said she wasn't at all phased by the backlash surrounding her pro-bulimia Doritos #BarfShow in Austin, TX. NBC Universal even allowed Gaga to once again put in a big fat "free" plug for her family's incomprehensible restaurant Joanne on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. In fact, the Today Show even posted a link to the restaurant on their website.

Gaga's new music video for "G.U.Y." will premiere on "Dateline NBC" airing Saturday evening at 8 p.m. It seems very odd indeed that of all the possible TV shows NBC Universal owns and controls, they placed this music video premiere on "Dateline," a hard news program. While any up-and-coming artist would be thrilled to have their work on "Dateline," it just seems like a bad dream for a superstar pop act.

Lady Gaga must be very grateful and indebted to NBC Universal for all of their help in keeping her alive and promoted heavily. Let's take a little stroll down Lady Gaga and NBC Universal partnership lane. Shall we?

Interscope Records, Lady Gaga's current label is owned by Universal. Lady Gaga gets the most press and play through NBC Universal properties such as the "Today Show." It appears that Gaga has her pick of where she can place herself.

Lady Gaga was thrown a bone and appeared in a cameo role for the little Universal Pictures film "Machette Kills." How could we forget that?

Gaga's new gay "bestie" is Andy Cohen at NBC Universal's Bravo! She appeared on "Watch What Happens Live," the same week that "Real Housewives of New Jersey" star Danielle Staub garnered much higher ratings from her appearance than Gaga. Gaga has now latched onto all the stars of the "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" for her "G.U.Y." video. This will encourage more of that coveted Bravo audience and little monster synergy. It is a surprise to learn that little monsters are fans of the Bravo TV series.

We all know that Gaga worked publicity around NBC's "Saturday Night Live" to death as a host and guest performer only to receive mediocre reviews. The opening number was good, but it went downhill from there. When her single "Do What U Want" was not doing well, Gaga went on NBC's "The Voice" and latched onto Christina Aguilera to help save the record and charting. While it was a cute performance in matching lame, it did not save "the Gaga single without a music video."

After the loss of her manager Troy Carter, lackluster album reviews and sales, a failed single with R. Kelly and vicious attacks online, Gaga shows up at NBC’s Golden Globes Party to redeem herself. She sashayed into the party wearing a dress made with the leftover fabric from her “The Voice” performance costumes. The NBC Universal Golden Globes award show party was held at The Beverly Hilton and who was on deck to help Gaga win more press attention there? None other than Paris Hilton's mother Kathy Hilton--the former star of NBC's hit reality show "I Want To Be a Hilton." Kathy Hilton also made a rare appearance this season on the "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills." Ms. Hilton aided in successfully wrangling the paparazzi to take photos of Gaga and her.

From there we saw a heavily publicized Gaga appearance and outlandish performance of her non-hit "Artpop" on NBC Universal’s "The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon" for the program's re-launch in New York.

Thank God for synergy and the help of a strong corporate network to keep the Gaga machine pumping. It is time to leave you with the biggest strategic NBC Universal partnership of them all for Lady Gaga. Her alleged man candy is Taylor Kinney, as we all know. He stars on a little NBC Universal show called "Chicago Fire.” Isn't that special? NBC Universal is the fame monster's lifeline that just keeps on giving - on TV and in the sack.

Up next for the Lady Gaga will be a week-long stint on NBC's "Days of our Lives" and a special live performance of "G.U.Y." at Lisa Vanderpump's new West Hollywood hot spot PUMP for the next season of "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills."

That's what you get when you do a deal with the powers that be. Enjoy!