A common complaint in couple concealing is, "He just doesn't know what turns me on or turns me off!" A big part of the problem is that too many couples go through their married life without being able to communicate their desires and needs. Couples should read this together so it can help them bring up subjects they may feel uneasy about broaching themselves. Let's check out the hot spots one by one. And keep in mind, we are not all the same ... what turns one person on may turn another off. Learn what Your Partner likes and needs.
The Pubic Mound
The pubic mound, the Mons Pubis in Latin, or Mons Veneris for Mound of Venus, or simply the Mons, refers to the fatty tissue thickening lying in front of the pubic bone of adult females. The pubic mound forms the fore-portion of the vulva, or external genitals of the human female. After puberty the pubic mound is normally covered with pubic hair.
The pubic mound divides back from its lower portion into the labia majora or larger outer lips on either side of the furrow, known as the pudendal cleft. The labia majora extend downward and backward from the Mons Pubis to the perineum.
The Mons Pubis is sensitive to estrogen, which causes a distinctive mound to form with the onset of puberty. To most women this area is pleasantly sensitive to touch; while to a few pressure and stimulation to the lower part of the mound may even bring on orgasm. The pubic mound is a visual turn on to most men.
The Clit or Clitoris
The clit, short for clitoris, is the female sexual organ comparable to the male penis, and is located starting at the base of the pubic mound, where the labia minora, or inner lips, convene. Like the male penis the clitoris consists of head, called the glans, at the tip of a longer part called the shaft. Like the male penis the clit contains cavernous bodies, which fill with blood when aroused and cause erection and increased sensitivity. The inner lips normally cover the shaft of the clitoris, forming a hood, or prepuce, similar to the male foreskin.
The glans, which looks like a small, button at the end of the shaft is by far the most sensitive part of the clitoris, and in most women the most erotic point of contact. It can be reviled by gently pushing back the skin of the clitoral hood. For most women stimulation of the clitoris is the surest and fastest rout to orgasm, but in some it is so sensitive that it can become irritated and a turn off. In those women stimulation has to be carefully titrated. There is a high focus of nerve endings in the clitoris and in the areas immediately surrounding it.
Like men’s penises, the size, and shape of clits vary considerably among women. Stimulation of the clitoral area by pressure, massage, and vibration is usually very pleasurable. In fact, providing sexual pleasure is the organ's main and only identified function. In fact, the clitoris is the only known organ in either sex with gratification being its sole purpose. It has nothing to do with reproduction or urination.
When a woman becomes sexually aroused, both the shaft and the glans fill with blood and increase in size, the glans capable of doubling in diameter. As erotic stimulation continues the organ responds more and more pleasurably, eventually reaching orgasm.
After orgasm the clitoris returns to its normal size within a few minutes. If she doesn't have an orgasm, sexual arousal may remain there, keeping the clitoris engorged for several hours. Most women find this uncomfortable, and frustrating.
Direct contact with the clitoris by touching it with a finger, or vibrator, may cause more discomfort than pleasure for many women. For these women, stimulation by rubbing or licking of the areas around the clitoris may be better tolerated. Other women enjoy very intense direct stimulation to the clitoral shaft or glans. There is great variability in sensitivity of the clitoris and each woman. Lubrication to the clitoris often resolves sensitivity problems.
The Labia Majora or Outer Lips
The labia are part of the female genitalia consisting of the major externally visible portions of the vulva. There are two distinct pairs of labia or lips: the outer labia, or labia majora, which are larger and fattier, while the labia minora are folds of skin frequently partially or completely concealed within the outer labia. These labia surround and protect the clitoris and the openings of the vagina and urethra. In most women they are pleasurably sensitive to stimulation.
The labia Minora or Inner Lips
The labia minora, or the inner vaginal lips, are two varying sized flaps of skin on either side of the clitoris and vaginal opening. They are situated between the labia majora. These Inner lips vary widely in size, color, and shape from woman to woman.
The inner lips extend from the base of the pubic mound, the clitoris, and extend backward on either side of the vulval vestibule, the part of the vulva between the labia minora into which the urethral opening and the vaginal opening open.
The upper part of each minor lip passes over the clitoris to meet, forming a fold, which overhangs the glans clitoris. The lower part becomes the clitoral hood. Like the labia majora, the labia minora in most women are pleasurably sensitive.
The Urethral Opening
Women use their urethra only for urinating, and like men also for ejaculating. The external urethral sphincter is a muscle allowing voluntary control over urination.
The Vaginal Opening and Vagina
The vagina is an amazingly elastic, muscular tube or canal with a supple, flexible lining, which provides lubrication and usually pleasurable sensation. The vagina provides a passageway from the uterus to the world outside. The vulva form, the outside entrance, and the cervix of the uterus protrudes into the vagina, forming its interior upper end.
It is the vagina, which receives the penis during sexual intercourse. The vagina also serves as a channel for menstrual flow from the uterus during periods. During childbirth, the baby passes through the vagina, or birth canal, which is capable of dramatic stretching.
The hymen, a thin membrane of tissue that surrounds the vaginal opening narrowing it prior to first penetration, however it is often torn or broken by exercise rather than sexual activity.
The Grafenburg or G Spot
The Grafenburg spot, usually called G-spot, is a very highly sensitive area adjacent to the entrance of the vagina. It remains a controversial issue among doctors and anatomists. Some people believe it is a bundle of nerves in the front wall of the vagina just behind the pubic bone. When the area is stimulated, it can cause intense pleasurable sensations for most women, often causing female ejaculation and intense orgasms. The area, about the size of a nickel to a quarter has a different feel to it from the rest of the vaginal tissue, described by some as similar to the corrugated feel of a walnut.
We are among those that do believe there is indeed a G-spot, but if there is or isn’t matters little if you have experienced this erotic spot in your vagina. To paraphrase the lyrics from the play South Pacific, “Once you have found it never let it go!”
The Skene’s Glands
The Skene's glands, which are also known as the lesser vestibular glands, periurethral glands, paraurethral glands, U spot, or female prostate, are small glands located in front of the anterior wall of the vagina, and around the lower end of the urethra. They open into the urethra near the urethral opening.
These glands are surrounded with part of the clitoris that reaches up beside the vagina and swells with blood during sexual arousal. The Skene's glands are similar to the prostate gland in males in both structure and origin. In the embryo the Skene’s Glands derive from the same cells as the male prostate, which in the man produce the semen that carries the sperm during orgasm. In the female these glands produce a liquid chemically similar to semen, and it may be expelled in considerable quantity during orgasm accompanied with female ejaculation.
The cervix is the "neck of the womb,” the lowest, narrowest part of the uterus, and it joins with the top end of the vagina. It protrudes through the upper anterior vaginal wall. The remainder lies above the vagina beyond view. The cervix has an opening, the cervical os, to allow sperm and menstrual fluid to move through.
The cervix is not generally a big player in the realm of erotic sites, though some women find pleasure when it is pummeled by penis or dildo.
The perineum is the small area that is located below the anus, and is quite rich in nerve endings. It is often overlooked as an erotic site, but for those who have discovered the perineum, it may become a favorite haunt. In women, the perineum extends from the front of the anus to the vaginal opening; for men it extends from anus to the base of the testicles.
Perineal massage, or massage of perineum, is an erotic technique used to provide sexual pleasure for both men and women. Since the perineum is so rich in nerve endings it feels pleasing to have it touched or stroked. Its stimulation is often incorporated into a couple's lovemaking further enhancing sexual arousal.
The anus, the external opening to the rectum has it’s main purpose in control of defecation, however, because the rectum has a relatively high concentration of nerve endings, and is an erogenous zone, anal intercourse and sex play may be found pleasurable for both an inserting partner and the receptive partner.
Pleasure from anal intercourse and play occurs owing to the shared wall, in males, between the anus and the prostate, and for women, vagina, and G-Spot. Insertion allows for indirect stimulation of the G-Spot or clitoral legs in women, and the prostate gland in men. For a male inserting partner, the tightness of the anus is a source of pleasure due to the pressure on the penis. Pleasure from the anus is often achieved through anal masturbation.
Read ""Fifty Shades Hotter Guide to Your Sexual Ecstasy" Kindle by Othniel Seiden, MD & Jane L. Bilett, PhD.