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is the window for love closing?

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My ex-husbands new wife told me recently that she felt sorry for me because she felt like my window of chances of finding true love were closing. This really bothered me for about 5 seconds. Then I realized a thing or two that I feel is important for others to know as well.

First of all, until you are dead your chances for finding love are alive. Heck, even after you are dead you can often be remembered and loved more than when you were alive. Look at President Reagan? My point here is this. Who decided that love has to do with dating? There are all kinds of different love and quite honestly it starts with yourself. If you don't love you, you are going to have an awfully hard time finding someone else to love you. Another point is this, if you have kids, which I have two full-time because my ex is derelict, you have no right to be off dating around the world, or even every night in your own city. You have kids to take care of. It is not their fault that one parent is an idiot.

When I got divorced I made a decision. If someone came along who I found dateable, I would date. However, I made a promise to myself and to my children that never would they wake up to a strange man in my bed. Not even a not so strange one. It has been my rule, I have stuck to it, and it has served me well. yes the bed gets cold at night. Yes there are days where I don't like my situation, but I sure love to know my kids are and feel safe and that they are secure in how this house is going to run.

One thing I have done is I have made a list of all of the qualities that I want in a man, husband and lover. I have these ordered in importance, and looks is not first on the list. Looks fade with time. Personality, and loyalty asa well as the ability to provide for a family are top on my list. There are other more general things on the list as well. Funny enough, some of them I had in my ex, most I did not. I don't envy his new wife in any way. Being pregnant with a strangers baby, it was one of the things my ex would do is take in strays. I even admit to being somewhat of a stray at times. As we were married over the years he began to change. Now let me put this in perspective. I don't mind if you have tattoos, but I was not a big fan and now he is covered in them. So is his new wife. Those are fantastic role models. Tattoos, drinking, smoking, cheating, illegitimate children and cussing.

Wow if that is what an open window of true love looks like I would rather keep mine closed thank you!



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