We are programmed, from a very young age, to know what love is and to begin searching for it. Although some may argue that there is a difference between how boys and girls view love, once adults, those arguments become irrelevant – we are all, on some level, looking for love; not just any kind of love, for many of us are born into loving families, we are searching for that grand love – the kind of love made for Greek Gods and Goddesses. The moment in which it happens is said to be explosive, instant, easy, or gradual and many other types of descriptive words, but the question stands: is love enough?
There are couples that have stood the test of time and despite all odds remained a couple – but what are the autopsy results of the many relationships that ended instantly, mystically, or even slowly over time? More importantly, what are the survival mechanisms implemented by those couples that have made it through hell and back? Should we focus on what has worked or what has caused relationships’ doom?
I do not claim to have the answers to the never ending questions about love, but can say that love cannot survive without friendship and friendship cannot exist without love. The latter does not have to imply romantic love – it could simply describe sisterly or brotherly love between friends, but the first mentioned is essential in the success of many long term relationships. If love, romance and sex are the only elements binding a couple it provides difficulty for humans to hold on to one another, as these are the elements within a relationship that ebb and flow. The feeling that you have in the first days, weeks, months or even first year of a relationship are exhilarating, passionate and boisterous to say the least – but it is friendship that will remain after these things fade.
The task of either becoming or staying friends can be challenging to say the least. Once romantically involved the lines and boundaries between the two become blurred, skewed and often hard to differentiate; but the results from the efforts to do so can be extraordinary. Love can be defined in many ways, but the idea of friendship is pretty straight forward, uncompromising and when done right, everlasting.