The holidays are fast approaching and it’s time to make plans on what you will be doing and where you will be going. The biggest question on your mind is if your relationship is ready for this stage-meeting the parents. There are a few things you should take into consideration and establish with one another before taking your relationship to the next level. Here are some helpful tips on if your relationship is ready for the next big step.
You’re exclusive-
When you go out in public and you happen to run into one of his friends, how are you introduced? Are you proudly introduced as his girlfriend or are you “this is Jackie”, his friend, or does he even introduce you at all? Ignoring the fact that he ran into a friend and “forgot” to introduce you could be a one time thing. But if it continues on, he is either embarrassed for some reason (which he shouldn’t be because you are a Goddess!) or he doesn’t want to put a label on your relationship. Either way, if he doesn’t proudly call you his girlfriend, don’t waste your time meeting the parents. Someone as fabulous as you has enough friends, you don’t need another one. If the situation is flipped and you don’t want a label on the relationship, evaluate why you feel that way.
How well you know each other-
You might know each other over a year or maybe a couple of months but a time frame is not as important as the quality time you spend with each other and how well you connect. Being comfortable to talk to each other about everything and anything makes all the difference on how good it will go. Your family might be, well, on the strange side. If you are always proper and poised around your significant other and are goofy with your parents, it will be an awkward situation when you go crazy with relatives and your very serious boyfriend is sitting there looking very confused.
How much you have told your families-
If you are on the phone with your mom and she asks you what are your holiday plans and you tell her “I’m going to Steve’s parents for the week in Boca Raton,” and she says, “Who’s Steve?” you might want to turn around and think about it. If you haven’t gushed and told your mom about how wonderful this new boyfriend is and he hasn’t done the same, you are not ready to meet the parents. I think some solid conversations to your parents about your relationship are in order before a meeting takes place.
Being prepared for the tough questions-
Parents always want the best for their children, so most likely, they are going to ask about your relationship. They want to know your religious views, do you want to get married, if you want children, what are your career goals, where you want to live. If your not ready to answer any type of questions like this or if you have never talked about it, either wait on meeting them or talk to your spouse on your future and what you both want out of the relationship.
Doing proper research-
Knowing a good bit of information about each other’s family will not only help you the day you meet them, but it also shows interest in the family and that you care. Know if his parents are still together, everyone’s names, pet peeves, anything that is a sensitive subject (an ex husband, a dog that might have just died, ect;) and something you might have in common. Knowing that you both have a passion for antique shopping can make a silent moment of staring turn into a great conversation. Ask lots of questions and do your research for a great time.
It’s not just about the parents-
Just remember around holiday times, not only are you meeting parents, you are also meeting brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents. That can be a lot of pressure but it doesn’t have to be. Be just as nice to them as you would to the parents because they count just as much as his parents (unless it’s the crazy grandma who hates everyone, then your off the hook). If your not ready to handle that kind of pressure, you might want to meet his parents before the holidays or wait until after the holidays are over. If meeting the parents this way is the only time because they live so far, try to get there a day or two early so you have time just to talk and meet with them. This way will take some pressure off of everyone.
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