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Info 101: Movieclips 165: The Vampire Academy is just dead

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"VAMPIRE ACADEMY: BLOOD SISTERS" from The Weinstein Company opens Fri., Feb. 7, 2014.

STARRING: Zoey Deutch, Danila Kozlovsky, Olga Kurylenko, Joely Richardson, Sarah Hyland and Gabriel Byrne.

DIRECTOR: Mark Waters ("Freaky Friday", "Mean Girls", "Mr. Popper's Penguins")

SYNOPSIS: Rose Hathaway (Deutch) is a Dhampir, half human/vampire, guardians of the Moroi, peaceful mortal vampires living discreetly within our world. Her legacy is to protect the Moroi from the Strigoi, bloodthirsty immortal vampires.

Oh, boy! Another vampire movie! Gosh! This is just so super-swell because it's been at lest six months since one has been in theaters. It's scary, too. It's almost as scary as Flo's singing in those Progressive commercials. We are so truly blessed in America that it will open here before it opens in many other countries. Yippee-ki-yay...

The people at the Weinstein Company seem to be completely clueless about why they're losing money. Oh, sure. People will go see this film and forget it before leaving the theater. That's because no one actually cares about vampires. They say they do because other people pretend it's cool but here's the real truth. They're going to see this movie to see pretty girls touch and kiss each other, hoping they'll get naked. Once they realize how little of that behavior there is (it's rated PG 13), this film is in one eye and gone with the wind.


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