![Dan Habib's award winning documentary film, "Including Samuel" is a treasure.](http://cdn2-b.examiner.com/sites/default/files/styles/large_lightbox/hash/80/5d/805d8d2f566c800dc7cdf9c67b6eb392.jpg "Dan Habib's award winning documentary film, "Including Samuel" is a treasure.")
On my own road to acceptance about my son’s special needs, I have noticed that many people transform during the process, become a different kind of person altogether. Maybe this is out of necessity but the process of learning to cope and that transformational energy is a potent force.
Mothers become advocacy champions. Fathers become inclusion warriors. They are bolder, louder, stronger, much more insistent than ever before. They are now advocates with new strength and purpose and the stuff of everyday is transformed; jobs, friends, careers. It may even be hard to remember what the “old days” were like.
Dan Habib is a good example. His “old days” included being a photojournalist with extensive documentary experience in China and whose work appeared in many publications including Time, Newsweek, Life, Mother Jones and the New York Times. But now he is the father of Samuel and thinks about inclusion every day.
“Including Samuel” is Habib’s award winning documentary film produced in collaboration with the Institute on Disability at the University of New Hampshire. Habib shares a unique and supportive working relationship with the Institute on Disability and plans more projects in the future.
To start off; this film is an absolute gem; charming, honest, frank and poignant yet very reassuring. I was not surprised to find out that it won so many awards and has been translated into 17 languages. All who see the film are enchanted by its simple honesty if not humbled by the force of love this film portrays.
The film captures the Habib family’s efforts to include Samuel in every facet of their lives, plus the hopes and struggles of four other individuals with disabilities. These profiles are touching and honest. Simultaneously displaying the many positive sides of inclusion and how sometimes as children get older it isn’t such a clear-cut decision.
As a social justice movement, the film examines the cultural and systemic barriers to inclusion with interviews from teachers, parents and disability rights experts. The film covers this point very effectively and taught me a lot about the issue.
My take away from the film was the importance of inclusion and why working to create a rich, happy life for someone with a disability is an empowering experience for everybody touched; parents and siblings, of course, but fellow students, mentors, peers, co-workers, friends and neighbors as well. We are all touched and enriched by inclusion.
With grace, Habib invites us into his family. The film is full of personal family moments; touchingly sprinkled with home video. We meet Samuel as his family sees him; a lively, fun, engaging and super adorable kid blessed with a loving older brother and adoring parents. Samuel just happens to have cerebral palsy.
I identify with the desire to introduce your child to the world, to have others see what you see; the adorable little self, not a kid with a disability. There is "that nice kid Samuel", not "that kid with an IEP". No parent wants to see the limitation on possibilities. This film shows just how limitless the possibilities are.
Habib and his wife, Betsy, are honest about the grief and sadness on their own journey. How he felt like he spent a long time just wanting to “fix” Samuel. I can identify with this as many parents of kids with special needs can, I am sure. It can be a profoundly heart-wrenching painful yet inspirational journey to work toward understanding and accepting your child’s special needs and what that means for their family’s future.
I was fortunate to speak with Habib and ask him about making the film and how it affected his family. “While working on the film, I was constantly struggling with when to be a dad and when to document the moment. Sometimes I just had to put down the camera and be a dad." Habib recalled.
And, he puts down the camera plenty. Habib is a key player in the film, working tirelessly to make sure that Samuel gets to participate in all aspects of daily life. I was particularly touched by how he assisted Samuel on the little league sports teams. Habib is a very committed father and an enthusiastic role model.
I couldn’t help wonder about the impact on all the other typically developing peers on the team and their parents. By making sure that Samuel could play, Habib opened up the very real idea of inclusion to many families who might never have had such a personal experience. What a powerful exercise.
I asked Habib how his family felt about being part of this film or if he plans to do a follow up film. “My wife is a very private person and we struggled with how much of our lives is in this film. But in the end it was a family decision to go ahead. As for a follow up movie, we have not yet decided and again I will leave it up to the whole family to decide.” Habib shared.
The relationship between Samuel and his big brother Isaiah is one of the most powerful parts of the film for me. These boys could be poster boys for sibling love and complete mutual acceptance. It sheds light on something hard to define yet familiar, an almost magical connection between siblings that I have seen before. They are forever affected by each other and it will always be so. Samuel and Isaiah share an open honest regard and sublime joy in each other. It is very sweet yet humbling to witness.
“You could do therapy with your kid all day every day. Speech, OT. But, I am not his therapist, I am his mother. I just want to be his mother.” Betsy, Samuel's mother, honestly attests in the film.
I found her statement hugely reaffirming as layers of guilt fell by the wayside . There is a tendency to want to try everything imaginable, to be constantly doing some sort of therapy. She is right, we can not be all things for our children, no matter how much we would like to be or feel we should be. Our kids need parents first and foremost.
As a parent of a child with special needs, I recognized and identified with this family on so many levels. I just hope that I show a fraction of the grace and commitment Habib and his wife show.
We all move toward acceptance in our own way while trying to stay relatively sane and strong for your child that needs you so much. It can be a crippling weight at times.
But this film pays homage to that journey and successfully showcases the love that drives parents to work to create a rich, happy life for their children. This film shows just how likely that something quite beautiful will come out of it all.
Right here in the Seattle area, Inclusion Werks, founded by Jennifer Monteleone a parent of a child who has developmental disabilities, takes the message in "Including Samuel" to heart.
The Inclusion Werks team of speakers includes people with developmental disabilities, parent advocates, siblings, and experienced staff. They are working hard to build opportunities for the full inclusion of people with developmental disabilities in education, employment, community living and community life. They foster connections between community members to increase the acceptance and understanding of all people and are a wonderful resource for the area.
They offer:
- school district in-service trainings
- student awareness programs and training on inclusion
- community inclusion and employment presentations, designed specifically for civic organizations (Rotary, Lions, Chamber of Commerce, Zonta, etc.)
- disability history
- legislative policy making to support people with developmental disabilities
To learn more about Inclusion Werks or to book a presentation, please contact Jennifer Monteleone, 425-293-1720 or jennifer@inclusionwerks.org.
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