Suzy Q. (not her real name) on the massage table lets out a big sigh and says to me, “What’s involved in becoming a massage therapist?”
“Are you considering a career change from teaching? I thought you loved teaching?” My hands kept working her shoulder as I wondered what was inspiring such a question.
“I do love teaching, but lately there have been issues that have… taken the joy out of it. Situations that I have no control over. It’s just making me rethink things,” she elaborated. “I’ve been teaching so long and I really don’t know how to do anything else…” Her voice trailed off into uncertainty and sadness.
I completely sympathized with Sue. Her issue was something I heard often in the massage room – a disconnection or discontent with one’s line of work and the frustration that they had no other options. They feel locked into the regular paycheck, the lifestyle that job afforded them, and all the obligations of those responsibilities. Like my client on the table, they’re not sleeping well, they dread going to work, they want a change and have no idea how to make it happen. It’s a terrible feeling, and over time it affects your health, your relationships… everything.
I asked her quietly while not breaking the flow of the massage. “What do you love to do in your free time? What are your hobbies? If you knew you could not fail, and money, etcetera, was not an issue… what would you do?”
She paused a moment and said with real conviction, “I love to cook; I love the whole natural, organic, whole food cooking thing.”
In that statement was the answer to her quandry. “Have you ever heard of the Institute for Integrative Nutrition?” I asked gently. “They offer classes on exactly what you love to do. And you already know how to teach - you’d just be teaching different subject material.” I gave her a minute to absorb what I just said. “You could get your nutritional counselor certification and then teach people how to cook healthy meals. That might be a good way to combine the skills you already have with something you enjoy doing…” I trailed off and finished my work at hand, wondering if I did the right thing by making my comment (after all, I’m a massage therapist, not a psychotherapist) as I left the room.
Sue thanked me as she put on her coat. “Wow, I forgot how good massage feels, and my neck is much looser now. Thanks for fitting me in today!” She waved goodbye and went back to her life. I went back to mine, and prepped for the next client.
Three months later when Sue called again, I expected she was booking another appointment; I could have never anticipated the news she laid on me. “I just signed up for those nutrition classes at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition; my Mom and I discussed what you suggested and she agreed that the timing was right to try something new. I can’t even tell you how excited I am! I can’t thank you enough!” I was quick to point out that I hadn’t told Sue anything she didn’t already know in her heart, and that the credit was all hers for being bold and taking control of her life. She agreed that she was due for a change, and I just gave her the “okay” to do what she was already allowed to do. People often already have the answer to their problems, but don’t trust themselves or accept it as truth until they hear it from someone else.
We are always allowed to direct our own lives. Our illusions that we are “locked in” are untrue; we perpetuate them, reinforce them with a million reasons… but the fact is everything in your life can be radically different in the blink of an eye. My friend Joe White often says “change happens in a split second – it does not have to take a long time to change things in your life!” (his job as a certified Life Coach largely revolves around breaking down barriers that we limit ourselves with so we can move forward and live fuller, more satisfying lives).
For Sue, this meant committing to more education in a different field, spending some money, and many weekends of classes. The long-term benefit is that she will be able to wean herself off of a dysfunctional school system and teach what she loves in the future. Other benefits of her decision have been immediate; she’s sleeping better, not worrying about her employment, and feeling confident. She’s behind the steering wheel of her life now, and the road is wide open before her. I personally can’t wait to see her next destination.
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