The fact of the matter is I'm gay. Always have been, always will be, because just as being straight, black, white, left or right handed – being gay isn't a choice, and it's just the way some people are born.
This may not come to much of a surprise to some of you since I have been openly “supporting” LGBT rights for the last few months. But I did that so you would have a chance to understand.
My two best friends have known since November 11, 2012, I told my best friends first; they were and are beyond supportive. Then a few weeks latter, I told a couple other close friends, they as well were supportive. I never imagined that I would have such amazing friends and class mates, considering the bad rap that small, conservative towns tend to have when it comes to gay people.
Ever since I realized that I was “different” sometime in second grade, I did my best to keep it a secret, and I was quite successful because I don't tend to fit the gay stereotype. But in June of 2012, I came across a video on YouTube of a teenager telling his coming out story. I never thought I would ever be able to tell anybody until I saw that video. It inspired me, and so I slowly, very slowly, started preparing myself to do what he did. I started sharing LGBT rights pictures on my facebook account and made it abundantly clear that I “support” the movement. I did this for two reasons: to observe how people would react, and to educate my friends on the topic.
I decided I would tell my best friends first, out of the two or three I consider “best” I chose Brandon because I heard him talking earlier in the summer of his support for the LGBT community and the fact that he has a family member who happens to be gay. So I figured, if anyone was going to understand, it would be him. And so after many hours of shaking and feeling sick to my stomach (telling an 18 year old secret isn't easy), I told him. He told our other best friend, Greg. The next day they invited me to Taco Bell (which we go to often) and acted the same, didn't treat me differently what-so-ever! I was so nervous, but it turned out I had nothing to be nervous about.
They started asking me questions and encouraging me to talk about it, which helped me tremendously to accepting myself.
A few weeks latter, I was sitting in my friend Vanessa's house, with one of my other good friends, Jeff. Jeff apparently noticed all my gay rights facebook postings, so, while we were all sitting down on the couch together, he asked me if I was gay. Surprised by the unexpected question, I tried to change the subject, but he kept on asking. He told me that he didn't care if I was gay or not, so I just said “ya I am” and tried harder than ever not to burst into tears! I don't know why it was so hard for me to say it, but it was. I always thought that I would loose all my friends and get bullied. None of those things have happened, in fact I think my friendship with my friends have only gotten closer.
Nothing to hide anymore...just me...all the way. Greg, Brandon, Vanessa, Jeff, and everybody else – I LOVE YOU GUYS! (no homo) :P
Take me or leave me, I am who I am, and I'm not going to act anymore.
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