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How to save your relationship by changing your thoughts By: Ask Jan

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What you think about comes about. What do you think about? Do you mostly have positive thoughts or are you a negative thinker. Negative thinking will cause you to fall short of your dreams.

Negative thinking interferes with relationships and your emotional well being. If you are a negative thinker you are more likely to suffer from depression, anxiety disorder, and anger management problems.

The good news is that we all have the power to change how we think. We can change our negative thoughts to more positive rational thoughts. Follow the suggestions listed below and start changing your negative thinking patterns.

Journal your negative thoughts

Catch your negative thinking patterns. Each time you verbalize or think a negative thought write it down. We must be aware of a problem before we can change the problem.

Thought stopping

Each time you think or verbalize a negative thought you must change it to a more positive rational thought. For example if you call yourself “a stupid idiot” because you lost your earphones immediately say “stop” then reframe the statement to a more positive rational statement. “I am not a stupid idiot it was an accident.”

Review your progress

Read your journal. Do you see a pattern of negative thinking? Have you been reframing your thoughts? Are you feeling more positive? In order to realize real change your efforts must be consistent. With consistent efforts you will begin to feel more hopeful, less anxious, less depressed, and more confident about yourself.

Changing your negative thinking to more positive thinking is the first step. To get you on the fast track to a happier life follow the suggestions below in conjunction with the thought stopping.

Get active

Do something you enjoy. Exercise promotes a feeling of well being, decreases stress levels, improves your health, and decreases depression.

Stop worrying

Don’t waste time and energy worrying about something that may not happen. Take one day at a time worrying causes needless suffering. If you start to worry “stop the negative thought and replace it with a more positive rational thought.

Depression is not permanent.

Remind yourself that depression will pass. Consider seeing a doctor or a therapist if you have suicidal thoughts, thoughts of hurting others or if the depression last more than two weeks.

You have the power to choose

Your are responsible for the choices you make. If you make a mistake take responsibility, learn from your mistake, apologize if appropriate, and move on with your life. Staying stuck in guilt is unhealthy and prevents you from being all that you can be.

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