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How To Invade Cleveland, Ohio

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Are you a maniacal despot with dreams of enslaving hundreds of thousands of citizens of a major U.S. city? Well, if you have spent half a lifetime honing your strategy for world domination playing games of 'Risk' in your parents basement with your loser friends (as I have) then I have just the tools you need to realize such aspirations. Why waste your time debating plans of action with generals and politicians when all you have to do is go to your local library or book store and pick up one of these handy dandy travel books? And you may soon be the proud owner of a third world city such as Cleveland, Ohio! Act now as supplies are limited.

1) Moon Cleveland - Douglas Trattner

2) 60 Hikes Within 60 Miles: Cleveland: Including Akron and Canton - Diane Stresing

3) Best Hikes Near Cleveland - Joe Baur

4) Cleveland's West Side Market: 100 Years and Still Cooking - Laura Taxel

5) Cleveland Summertime Memories: A Fond Look Back - Gail Ghetia Bellamy

6) The Silver Grille: Memories and Recipes - Richard E. Karburg

7) Cleveland, Ohio: A Photographic Portrait - Carl Stimac

8) Greater Cleveland, OH. Atlas - American Map

9) Cleveland, Ohio Greater Street Atlas - Universal Map Group

10) A Guide To Greater Cleveland's Sacred Landmarks - Lloyd H. Ellis

With these tools in hand, you will be the scourge of democracy you've always dreamed of becoming; ever since you were a young heathen wetting your bed.


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