Have you ever gone out to eat with your family and right as you sit down, your child starts jumping up and down, yelling for certain crayons, or just acting plain hellacious? Then as you look around you, half sympathetically and half apologetically, you see another family with kids that are being quiet, calm, and generally well behaved? Ever wonder how those parents did it? How did they have kids that act so amazing? Were they blessed with angels or is it something else? Ever wonder how you can go from being in scenario one to being in scenario two? Honestly, its easy, and you can be the parent with the angelic kids, if you follow these three simple steps.
Step one: realize you are the parent and they are the child. Once you realize who the parent is in your relationship with your child, life will be instantly one hundred times better. As the parent you hold all the cards. You decide when your child eats, drinks, snacks, gets toys, bathes, and every other item in his or her daily life. You hold the power, not your child. Take back that power and embrace it!
Step two: learn to stick by your word. Children are natural testers. They will push and push you until either you give in or they realize you are staying strong. If you tell your child no, stick with that decision. Yes it’s easier to give in, but once you do, you only make your next battle harder. Let the tantrums fly. You’re not the first parent to experience one and you will not be the last. Whatever you do, stick by what you say. Once your child realizes that this is the way it’s going to be, they will test you less and less.
Step three: give your child a choice. Children are ultimately powerless, so give them a say in their life. But, make sure you are ok with either option they pick. Start small, and make sure the decision is age appropriate. For example, in the grocery store, tell them that if they behave, they can choose a candy at the register. This gives you a well behaved child through the store and they get candy at the end. If they choose to misbehave, then they have chosen not to get candy. It’s honestly really simple.
You may think that it’s not this easy, but it honestly is. Be the adult. Let them be the child. Do not be afraid of others opinions because this is your child and you are doing the best you can! Chin up, it will get better!
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