It seems like every time you are counting on your friend for something important, she is a no-show. Yet, the minute your pal needs you, you drop everything to be there for her. Sound familiar? Why do we fall into these traps, get caught in one-sided friendships that are hard to get out of?
And the thing that really gripes me about these people, is that they will never admit they are wrong! It goes something like this, "What do you mean I'm not there for you. I am always available when you need me!" Sure, got it. So, what to do now? Do you drop her, and never have anything to do with these types again. Hardly, then you literally would have no friends! But you have to put them on the back burner, for your own sanity at least.
The next time she calls you for the ten thousandth time about the exact same problem, listen...to a point. What I mean is, put a time limit on the phone call. The minute you pick up the phone, tell her, "Look, I only have 10 minutes, then I have to run. What's up?" And then listen and offer your advice...but the minute the clock hits 10 after, hang up. And I mean, hang up. Say quickly that you've got to run, and you'll talk to her later, and then yes, put down the phone. You have to. Otherwise this person will continue to suck up your time, and of course, will never be around when you need her.
This way, you keep your friend, but you aren't all that emotionally invested in the friendship. And you don't allow her to let you down. Keeping someone at arm's length will at least allow you to maintain contact, while you look for friends who really care about you.
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