All too often adult children are becoming the parents to their moms and dads, but how can they do it without needing a straitjacket?
This is a tough question, but many adult children are doing it by: sharing the load with siblings or other relatives, participating in support groups and relying on retirement and assisted living communities.
Some adult children attempt to play hero or sacrificial lamb by taking on too much by themselves. This is a surefire way to reach caregiver burnout and earn a psych referral.
The best approach is to share the wealth with siblings and relatives. For example, one sibling may be responsible for mom's finances, another for her healthcare and yet another may head up her social engagement. When siblings share responsibilities or rotate duties the burden becomes much lighter for all. It is also comforting for parents to know all their children are playing a role in their care.
Support groups can be vital in helping maintain sanity. These groups give you the opportunity to share your experiences, vent and also have a lot of fun with others that have similar situations plaguing them.
Finally, many adult children are helping their parents find a retirement or assisted living community to live in rather than moving them in with them or building a mother-in-law house.
Having mom or dad living with you can be very difficult when you are working, raising your own children and trying to build a wonderful marriage. Ease the burden by seeking out a retirement community for them. The community can provide social activities, meals, housekeeping, transportation services and much more to help you, your parent and your relatives.
