“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but thought about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral. It is as it is.”
On a recent episode of Rise UP with B. Dave Walters we talked about how to avoid being disappointed, and how to feel at peace, along with how to release the pain of the past, let go of past hurts, how to access the true power of your mind, and much, much, more!
So today, I’d like to give you the simplest and most powerful tool possible to avoid disappointment, but first I’ll give you some clues as to what it is:
“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.”
“If you expect nothing from anybody, you’re never disappointed.”
― Sylvia Plath
“I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations.”
― Bill Watterson
“Look. I have a strategy. Why expect anything? If you don’t expect anything, you don’t get disappointed.”
― Patricia McCormick
“Know that everything is in perfect order whether you understand it or not.”
― Valery Satterwhite
“The two hardest tests on the spiritual road are the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage not to be disappointed with what we encounter.”
― Paulo Coelho
“If someone is able to show me that what I think or do is not right, I will happily change, for I seek the truth, by which no one was ever truly harmed. It is the person who continues in his self-deception and ignorance who is harmed.”
― Marcus Aurelius
“Life is pain, this is the first Noble Truth. The root of all pain is attachment, this is the Second Noble Truth.”
Yes, the secret is this: If you do not expect anything, then you will not be disappointed by what life brings to you. On the surface, this might seem at best pessimistic, and at worst impossible, but I promise you that it can be done!
Think about the last thing that you were upset about; a minor annoyance, or even something bigger. Now ask yourself: Was what actually happened *bad*, or simply not what you thought was going to happen? Boiled down to their essence, very few things are ‘good’ or ‘bad’ in and of themselves, they just are how they are, and we make them mean what we make them mean. But more often than not, the meanings we attach to things are only causing us harm. There’s a story of a man with two daughters, one owns and umbrella shop and asks her father to pray for rain. The other makes pottery for a living, and asks the father to pray for sunshine…which is the ‘right’ answer?
If there is a person that you’ve had a disagreement with, ask yourself: Were your expectations reasonable? Did you clearly express to the person what it is you need, and why?
Here is a test: If your best friend was in the exact same situation, what would you say to them? As you know, human beings have an INFINITE capacity for self-deception, and looking at a situation like it’s happening to someone else can often make it easier to see.
So, the next time you feel disturbed by something, stop yourself and ask: What’s really happening here? Is this situation actually ‘bad’ or am I hung up on something? And is that something I can release right now and go with the flow? And if not…what can I do to change it?
Since, as Plato said “there are two things we should never be upset over: What we can change, and what we cannot.”
What do you think? Feel free to comment down below!
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B. Dave Walters Writer, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host
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