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Losing a parent at any age is devastating and even more painful when you are a child. Children who lose a parent at a tender age have to experience emotions that are indescribable. Their care-free life is quickly and permanently altered, and dealing with the magnitude of the loss can be very difficult. How can children cope and begin to understand the lose a parent at a tender age.
It was during this time of year; my niece and nephew were excited and eager about settling into the new school year when they experienced the sudden death of their father 5 years ago. As you can imagine the entire family was in shock, it took a lot of strength for the family to pull together and carry on.
If you have experienced this in your family or know someone who has, here are some helpful steps in rebuilding your child's life.
- Don't be afraid to show emotions around the children, they need to know that what they are feeling is shared by others.
- Surround them with extended family members, this form of help is an invaluable support system. During this transitional period having occasional family meetings with the children can be very productive.
- Provide your child with spiritual guidance, utilize reading material that is age appropriate.
- Let the children escape for a few days by planning a vacation, if possible.
- Open communication about what happened and why is therapeutic. Internalizing emotions is not healthy for anyone.
- Steps on rebuilding a child's life vary depending on the age of the child.
- Notify your child's school and inquire about available grief counseling.
- Special occasions and holidays can be difficult for a long time. Try to engage your children in a new venture or experience that they can look forward to before the approach of special occasions and holidays
- Notice if there are significant changes in your child's personality or behavior, individual counseling may be needed.
- Take one day at a time and continue to reassure the children that they have your love and support.
Extended family members should continue to provide a support system for the children. Interest, concern and involvement in their lives on a regular basis is recommended. My niece and nephew are currently 16 and 14 years old, respectively. They are still growing and developing; so far they are thriving beautifully. :-)
Continue to be there for your child or loved one who has experienced this type of lose, weather the relationship is; as an uncle, aunt, grandparent or cousin. They need our love and support, this will contribute in rebuilding their lives.
To: My niece and nephew - Both of you are developing so nicely, keep the spiritual faith and continue being the best you can be!
Pride & Love Always!!
Aunt Sharon
Helpful resource links below:
http://www.hopkinschildrens.org/...and.../death_dying_bib.pdf
http://www.library.ci.manchester.ct.us/deathanddying.htm
www.joannemccall.com/press/DonnaPressKit2.pdf
Comments
This was an excellent article and one that many families can relate to.
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