You had no control over your birth or your birth order; however, your birth does have a lot to do with your personality, your successes and your failures.Your birth order has made a significant impact upon your life whether you are an only child, the oldest child, the middle child or the youngest of your siblings. According to psychologists and sociologists, your birth order plays a big role in your life.
Michael Grose, an Adlerian-trained parenting expert and author of "Why First Borns Rule the World and Last Borns Want to Change It" explains the basics of the birth order. He contends that "We’re in a Darwinian struggle from the moment we’re born, fighting for scarce resources within a family – our parents’ time, love and affection." Through human evolution, birth order has determined who inherits power. Usually it's the first-born. Birth order also determines who is sent to war. Usually it's the youngest as he is considered the spare.
Grose contends that first borns are less susceptible to disease and are more likely to reproduce as adults. The birth of the first born is most eagerly anticipated more than the other children. Their first steps, first words, and first everythings are celebrated. By the time the other children are born, parents do not celebrate as much.
Since first borns receive so much attention, they are more confident and welcome power into their lives as adults. First borns are known to be achievers. Grose says that most world leaders are first borns. The legal profession is filled with first borns.
First borns are thought to be anxious, emotionally intense, defensive and prone to jealous rages. This is because they are the only siblings who experience having their parents all to themselves for a while before having to share them when other children are born. Another characteristic of first borns is that they are cautious and avoid risks. They’re the least likely to travel or undertake any daring feats.
Famous first borns include more than half the United States Presidents, Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, George W. Bush, Benito Mussolini, Adolf Hitler, Saddam Hussein, Kylie Minogue and Cherie Blair. First borns and only children include every US astronaut and most Nobel prize-winners. Typical professions are law, politics, science and accountant. Only children include Winston Churchill, Joseph Stalin, Franklin D. Roosevelt, Jean Paul Sartre, Burt Bacharach, Frank Sinatra, and Tiger Woods.
The main difference between only children and first borns with other siblings is that they never experience having to share their parents with siblings. For this reason, they feel like outsiders, distanced from much of life. The only child is thought to be extremely mature.
Theorists believe the middle children lose out as they are neither the precious, able, oldest, nor the vulnerable youngest. Their strength is that they learn to be more flexible and sociable, to compromise and build coalitions. Middle children tend to be more relaxed.
The middle children might find it harder to carve out their niche. They feel like outsiders believing they are overlooked in the oldest or youngest sibling's shadow. The middle child survive by forging friendships outside the family.
Middle children include many who are in retail, sales, fashion, advertising or the caring professions. Stella McCartney, Michelle Pfeiffer, Jacqueline du Pré, Princess Diana, Cindy Crawford, Cate Blanchett, Emily Brontë are middle children.
The youngest children are more likely to question the order of things and develop a revolutionary personality. Many last borns choose a completely different path than their older siblings to avoid direct competition. They are the babies of the family, and may grow up expecting others to take responsibility. They are usually not volunteers.
Youngest children are thought to be rebels, non-conformists, also drawn to creative professions and performing arts. Some youngest children include Joan of Arc, Mahatma Gandhi, Charles Darwin, Leon Trotsky, Charlie Chaplin, Hugh Grant, and Johnny Depp.
Cliff Isaacson, author of "Birth Order Effect for Couples," believes birth order can even help you find a partner. He says two third borns make the best couples because they relate without conflict, and there is a lot of humor. Two first borns rarely connect. There’s no compromise, and the pairing is not a happy relationship.
What is your birth order? Have you found any of the above to be true in reference to your birth order? The best reason to know about your birth order is to understand yourself and your children a little better.